“Shhhh-it!”: Idolator’s Super-Secret Music-Biz Interview Series Continues

Brian Raftery | December 6, 2006 10:49 am
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In October, we launched our AnonIMous Interview Series, in which we anonymously grill a seasoned music-biz veteran; it’s all part of our double-headed effort to get more industry dirt, and to run more pictures of cats (we’ve said it before, and we’ll say it again: cats are nature’s little clip art). This time around, we talk to a big-wig music publicist who’s worked with both Grammy winners and Pitchfork faves:

MusicPublicityBigWig: if all youve got is a single or one or two, maybe four good songs MusicPublicityBigWig: then yeah a leak is going to hurt. hurt you good. MusicPublicityBigWig: records always leak. it just a matter of when. MusicPublicityBigWig: but all my clients seem to be doing just fine

More anonIMous(TM) anecdotes, zingers, and boasts after the click-through!

VivSavage1984: alright, so first: can you give a thumbnail–for the kids–of what your job entails? MusicPublicityBigWig: lets see… MusicPublicityBigWig: conceptually MusicPublicityBigWig: managing the media, image, print and TV appearances of the big stars and making sure the little ones get something, anything at all! MusicPublicityBigWig: non-conceptually MusicPublicityBigWig: taking and making calls and e-mails about all of that, organizing mailings and/or listenings (ugh) for reviews, features, organizing guest lists for shows, scheduling interviews, coming up with press and tv strategy, gameplan, all that fun stuff MusicPublicityBigWig: generally staying up the ass of people like you–but just far enough MusicPublicityBigWig: just far enough that its pleasurable but not far enough that it becomes painful MusicPublicityBigWig: thats pretty good huh? VivSavage1984: for someone who sits on their ass all day like me, it can be painful. so, in terms of magazines: what are the big gets? what magazines do you lobby for with the most urgency? MusicPublicityBigWig: depends on the client VivSavage1984: right. well, let’s say for the top-tier clients. rolling stone? spin? Ew? blender? murder dog? MusicPublicityBigWig: Blacktail MusicPublicityBigWig: Bird Talk MusicPublicityBigWig: seriously though… MusicPublicityBigWig: for top tier clients it has to be a good balance MusicPublicityBigWig: like yeah a rolling stone cover is a big get of course MusicPublicityBigWig: but again depending on the client MusicPublicityBigWig: an NPR show combine with a Sunday cover of a major newspaper and and SNL appearance that week could be the way to go MusicPublicityBigWig: its funny though that so many smaller places react to interview denial with “oh sor-ree we’re not ROLLING STONE!” MusicPublicityBigWig: which is amusing to me as I haven’t had an artist on the cover of RS since i think 2001? VivSavage1984: yeah, which mags/outlets are a pain in the ass to work with? MusicPublicityBigWig: thats an odd one too MusicPublicityBigWig: youd expect the biggest stars to be the biggest dicks, right? totally not the case. MusicPublicityBigWig: while there are angels and assholes (isnt that a band?) at every level MusicPublicityBigWig: its mostly smaller fry who think they’ll get A-list attention by acting like assholes MusicPublicityBigWig: who are the biggest problem VivSavage1984: examples, please! MusicPublicityBigWig: i dont know if youve even heard of em MusicPublicityBigWig: AMP, a magazine from the west coast MusicPublicityBigWig: AMPLIFIER from mass. MusicPublicityBigWig: quite a few freelancers, zinesters MusicPublicityBigWig: these are people i have to tell its not that youre “not ROLLING STONE,” youre NOT GOOD MusicPublicityBigWig: or unique MusicPublicityBigWig: and that if they threw in the towel and stopped publishing tomorrow NO ONE WOULD CARE MusicPublicityBigWig: its very zen MusicPublicityBigWig: “if a new issue of AMP doesn’t come out and no one notices… does it not come out?” MusicPublicityBigWig: grasshopper VivSavage1984: but surely, there must be some dick moves at spin, stone, blender? right? are they still the big 3? MusicPublicityBigWig: yeah i guess there are but they’re just tons more professional MusicPublicityBigWig: in general VivSavage1984: so they never, ever drive you cocnuts? ever?? VivSavage1984: i meant coconuts VivSavage1984: but cocnuts is better! MusicPublicityBigWig: eh i dunno its been a long time since ive had a knock down drag out with any of those MusicPublicityBigWig: i mean i have MusicPublicityBigWig: but i think we all understand one another if that makes sense VivSavage1984: ok, well what about these so-called “music blogs”? do you or your clients even care about them? MusicPublicityBigWig: well theyre the flavor of the moment MusicPublicityBigWig: but they’ll get strip-mined and co-opted just like everything else that was the way to instant sales for 15 minutes MusicPublicityBigWig: college radio, late night TV, street team marketing MusicPublicityBigWig: film syncs and soundtracks, TV ads MusicPublicityBigWig: theres always something VivSavage1984: bloggers must drive you crazy with requests MusicPublicityBigWig: dont get me wrong. i think its great to have such a dialogue, direct w/the fans, and an actual community MusicPublicityBigWig:: nah they dont really MusicPublicityBigWig: most of the bloggers think my clients are inaccessible MusicPublicityBigWig: so they dont even bother MusicPublicityBigWig: and i aint complaining VivSavage1984: which do you like/dislike? MusicPublicityBigWig: but i help ’em out whenever possible MusicPublicityBigWig: well i have been enjoying idolator… youre the greatest, no YOU are… OK now that we’re done sucking each others dicks VivSavage1984: yeah, until we leak one of your clients new mp3s! MusicPublicityBigWig: never happen! MusicPublicityBigWig: i got that shit on lockdown MusicPublicityBigWig: anyway MusicPublicityBigWig: i like a lot of the mainstream writers blogs, like sasha frere jones, alex ross, like people who can actually WRITE and have some concept of factchecking VivSavage1984: factwhating? MusicPublicityBigWig: and i like some of the uberfans like stereogum, brooklynvegan VivSavage1984: ok, so what about pitchfork? do they really have the power to make/break a band? MusicPublicityBigWig: depends MusicPublicityBigWig: their power is sort of the opposite of the major labels, stay with me here MusicPublicityBigWig: they can propel a band from selling like 3000 to 30,000 or whatever, they can start that whole process MusicPublicityBigWig: and yes they can impede a travis morrison or whoever they give a zero, but he doesn’t sell any goddamn records anyway MusicPublicityBigWig: but if you’re on a level of some of my bigger clients and they slam you, it has no effect. MusicPublicityBigWig: no effect on anyone who already sells half a million or more VivSavage1984: i love when that example comes up–like it was “james cameron’s travis morrison album.” that thing wouldn’t have sold no matter what! MusicPublicityBigWig: exactly MusicPublicityBigWig: see the major labels specialize in taking people who can sell 200,000+ on their own to selling 500,000 or 1 million MusicPublicityBigWig: but they don’t have any apparatus for taking an artist from 0 to 30,000 MusicPublicityBigWig: they have no effect MusicPublicityBigWig: at that level MusicPublicityBigWig: these days though the indie labels are behaving just like mini-majors though MusicPublicityBigWig: but thats another topic entirely MusicPublicityBigWig: why is travis morrison or any number of similar records MusicPublicityBigWig: being worked by a marketing team–PR, distro, radio, etc.–when it would sell just as many–or as few–off the dude’s own site or myspace or at his shows VivSavage1984: hmm. speaking of major-label apparatus, how much time do they have left? will it just become catalog sales? VivSavage1984: and 1-2 million sellers? MusicPublicityBigWig: eh MusicPublicityBigWig: no kid cares about catalogue MusicPublicityBigWig: once our generation is gone, the box set will go the way of the brontosaurus MusicPublicityBigWig: thats just the impression i get from my work MusicPublicityBigWig: some major corporation or sponsor will always exist as patronage for the arts MusicPublicityBigWig: digital distribution, whatever MusicPublicityBigWig: and there always has to be some support team helping consumers or fans or whatever sort through everything MusicPublicityBigWig: thats where people like me come in MusicPublicityBigWig: same w/radio, retail, etc MusicPublicityBigWig: the balance of power has shifted so much MusicPublicityBigWig: used to be image of what i do was gatekeeper, like the only way to the publics eyes and ears was through big media, big tv MusicPublicityBigWig: now it’s all realigning MusicPublicityBigWig: but i think we’re getting off topic. VivSavage1984: ha! ok, so let’s turn to the sexy, sexy world of digital music: how bad do these mp3/album leaks hurt? how crazy is the lockdown going to get? i got an indie album with like three stickers and a watermark this week, and i thought, “really?” MusicPublicityBigWig: its retarded MusicPublicityBigWig: i heard this quote the other day MusicPublicityBigWig: some label kid at a meeting said the mistake the music biz is making MusicPublicityBigWig: is like the bottled water companies trying to turn everyone’s taps off MusicPublicityBigWig: great analogy MusicPublicityBigWig: my answer would have to be MusicPublicityBigWig: if all youve got is a single or one or two, maybe four good songs MusicPublicityBigWig: then yeah a leak is going to hurt. hurt you good. MusicPublicityBigWig: records always leak. it just a matter of when. MusicPublicityBigWig: but all my clients seem to be doing just fine MusicPublicityBigWig: having strongest first week sales ever MusicPublicityBigWig: i cant name names of course but you know who i mean VivSavage1984: yeah but because a lot of your clients are bigger, don’t their management hate leaks and try to stop them? MusicPublicityBigWig: well they try to protect it and forestall the inevitable MusicPublicityBigWig: but the smart managers–and i could have an industrial bandsaw accident and still count them all on less than both hand VivSavage1984: tee hee MusicPublicityBigWig: realize that the future of their artists’ financial well being is not in plastic discs MusicPublicityBigWig: the labels, who are the owners of these master recordings, are the ones who are more paranoid MusicPublicityBigWig: and with good reason MusicPublicityBigWig: thats their only real revenue source MusicPublicityBigWig: but i dont want to sound like either their enemy or advocate VivSavage1984: ah, of course MusicPublicityBigWig: thats not my business, literally and figuratively MusicPublicityBigWig: whenever a civilian, like a relative or non-business friend asks me MusicPublicityBigWig: “oh the music business is in trouble, are you OK?” MusicPublicityBigWig: i say MusicPublicityBigWig: “the CD-selling business is in trouble. im not in that business” MusicPublicityBigWig: im in the business of my clients and theyre all doing fine. MusicPublicityBigWig: i think this year will be the 4th consecutive year weve been up MusicPublicityBigWig: but thats also because of the kind of clients i take on/turn down VivSavage1984: alrighty, speaking of clients, you have to shepherd them through award shows, parties, etc. so you’ve had a lot of run-ins with other musicians. tell us some assholes you’ve met! and why. MusicPublicityBigWig: hahahaha MusicPublicityBigWig: britney spears wanted one of my artists’ VIP tables at a VMAs aftershow like 4 yrs ago MusicPublicityBigWig: but my wife wouldnt get up for her so they couldnt have it! MusicPublicityBigWig: what else MusicPublicityBigWig: i had an ex-client who was so upset about getting shut out at the grammy awards 6 or 7 years ago, he ran away from me and my staff and did the press room without us VivSavage1984: ha! MusicPublicityBigWig: i used jedi mind trick to get rid of that fool VivSavage1984: have you ever wanted to throttle anyone? MusicPublicityBigWig: well yeah of course VivSavage1984: one zesty name! VivSavage1984: you’ve got more dirt than neil strauss! MusicPublicityBigWig: shit i dunno VivSavage1984: it can be anyone you’ve met in your travels. anyone! MusicPublicityBigWig: well most of those have become kinda public MusicPublicityBigWig: so i cant say without giving myself away MusicPublicityBigWig: i wish i could do what uwe boll did VivSavage1984: ah, yeah, but who would you spar with? VivSavage1984: you set yourself up for that one! MusicPublicityBigWig: i cant name one MusicPublicityBigWig: cuz it was public MusicPublicityBigWig: lawsuit yada yada VivSavage1984: right VivSavage1984: carol channing? MusicPublicityBigWig: hahahahaah VivSavage1984: she wanted that AP cover, goddamnit! MusicPublicityBigWig: lets come back to that one MusicPublicityBigWig: though when some writers do get snippy like that im always thinking MusicPublicityBigWig: like ghostface killah MusicPublicityBigWig: “thats whats wrong with these kids, they dont they ass beat no more” VivSavage1984: ha! MusicPublicityBigWig: seriously MusicPublicityBigWig: a writer once said to me MusicPublicityBigWig: well it would be nice if i HAD the album to WRITE ABOUT MusicPublicityBigWig: and i was like MusicPublicityBigWig: shithead, did you talk to your folks like that when you wanted something? it would be NICE if had SOME DINNER MusicPublicityBigWig: if i was your dad i would have that belt out like NOW MusicPublicityBigWig: they just have no character MusicPublicityBigWig: no social skills MusicPublicityBigWig: its sad really VivSavage1984: are you telling me music writers have no social skills??! VivSavage1984: zounds! MusicPublicityBigWig: well as an ex-writer myself… MusicPublicityBigWig: well, look MusicPublicityBigWig: we’re all MUSIC publicists and MUSIC writers and MUSIC execs VivSavage1984: true dat MusicPublicityBigWig: because we dont have the skills to be the REAL versions VivSavage1984: ha! MusicPublicityBigWig: MUSIC business people are the GYM TEACHERS of the adult world! MusicPublicityBigWig: not good enough to be professional musicians? write about it! VivSavage1984: most of us are flabby and cant climb a rope, but we want everyone else to climb it perfectly MusicPublicityBigWig: its fine as long as you realize and dont take it so seriously MusicPublicityBigWig: there you go MusicPublicityBigWig: well said