Now that 50 Cent has announced his entry into the condom business–as he says in a press release, “You’re either a lubrican or a lubricant”–perhaps it’s time to look back at the other Top 40 stars who have branched into the safe-sex industry. After all, Fitty is hardly the first: Frankie Goes To Hollywood gave one away with a 1987 cassingle, and Aerosmith subtly sent one out as a promotional item for the group’s “Pink” single. Sophie B. Hawkins, meanwhile, is still making a mint from “Damn! I Wish I Was Your Lover!” dental dams. After the click-through, our users’ guide to some of the most rockin’ rubbers of all time:
U2′s “Achtung Baby” tour condom (199?)
NICKNAME: The BoNO
PROS: Sold during the band’s early-’90s Zoo TV jaunts, and guaranteed to last for the duration of one of Bono’s mid-song “Bullet The Blue Sky” speeches.
CONS: Who’s gonna ride your wild horses when you’re using a 15-year-old rubber?
Madonna condom (2001)
NICKNAME: Papa Don’t Breach
PROS: These unauthorized imports feature images from Madge’s infamous mid-’80s nude-photo sessions.
CONS: A disappointed Danny Aiello will glower at you from the room next door if you use them incorrectly.
Kiss Kondoms (2002)
NICKNAME: The Love Gun
PROS: Combines the thrill of schlocky merchandising tie-ins with the forced comedy of strained alliterations.
CONS: Every 100th condom shipped arrives at your door attached to Gene Simmons.