Michael Jackson Wants To Tell You About His Exciting Package

Jan 26th, 2007 // 2 Comments

The last time we heard from Michael Jackson, he was looking like the guy from V For Vendetta, and forgetting all the words to “We Are The World.” Now he’s back in the states–his people won’t say where, but we hear it’s a dirty-thatched hut somewhere in Six Flags Discovery Kingdom–and he needs some money:

[Jackson] is on the comeback trail – planning a pair of “fan appreciation events” in Japan in March, one of which will charge $3,300 for the opportunity to meet the Gloved One…

Broderick Morris, the promoter working the Japan side of Jackson’s trip, said they have sold 220 of 300 tickets to a “platinum VIP party” on March 8. Guests will have dinner, get autographed photos and be able to “meet and greet” Jackson for 30 seconds to one minute, he said.

Of course, a 30-second face-to-face isn’t going to be enough for some Jackson fans, so for $1,000 extra, you get the “P.Y.T. V.I.P.” package, which includes an autographed cassingle of “Blood On The Dance Floor,” a DNA-free stuble-strand from Jackson’s ever-evolving chinstrap, and a very nervous toucan that will never, ever want to be held. Act now!

Michael Jackson returns to the U.S. [AP]

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  1. PengIn

    It’s been too long since I’ve seen the word “cassingle”. Too long.

  2. Hyman Decent

    300 suckers x 30 seconds per sucker = 9000 seconds = 150 minutes = 2½ hours, not counting breaks. I bet the attendees will wind up getting more like 3 seconds with Jacko, each.

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