Record Label Tries To Find Love In The Classifieds

Do you enjoy seeing lots of middling-to-middlinger live bands? Do you like sitting in a studio and nodding a lot? Do you pine for a job where you don’t have to go looking for the cocaine–the cocaine comes looking for you? Well, then today’s your lucky day, because Sony BMG is searching for a new A&R director–and they even took out a classified in Sunday’s New York Times to prove it:

Director, Senior, A+R (Manhattan) Oversee, initiate, and develop creative repertoire for established artists; manage and oversee recording budgets including producer deals, artists deals, and production deals; responsible for establishing a joint venture with a major record producer; screen, handle, and deal with A+R for President of company; oversee and manage song testing process for all acts, including result analysis Must have experience in managing artists with multiple platinum plus in sales and for marketing budgets of over $5,000,000+, Reqs; Master of Communications degree plus two years experience as Music Marketing Analyst or a Bachelor of Communcation [sic] degree plus five years progressive experience as Music Marketing Analyst. Must also have managerial experience in A+R Send resume and letter of interest to: Room 1587, Attn: Senior Director, A+R, SONY BMG MUSIC ENTERTAINMENT, 550 Madison Avenue, New York, NY 10022. NO PHONE CALLS PLEASE.

At first we assumed this was just a requirement-fulfilling formality, but then we started to think about the dozens of heavily experienced A&R folks we know–people who have spent ten years and more than $5 million on their artists, and yet still sit at home, waiting for the phone to ring. This could be their time to shine!

Director, Senior [NYTimes Job Market, via the Velvet Rope]