Karl Rove Knows How To Move The Conservative Bass

Mar 29th, 2007 // 41 Comments

If you’ve ever wondered what it would be like to watch White House Deputy Chief Of Staff Karl Rove flail around a stage while a badly executed rap song plays in the background, now’s your chance: At last night’s Radio and Television Correspondents’ Association dinner in D.C., Rove was briefly turned into “MC Rove,” an awkwardly move-busting hype-man with a honkified flow not heard since Rappin’ Ronnie. Wait until the 1:40 mark, and look for Rove’s debut album, Die B.O.L.D., out on Koch in May.

Mc Rove [YouTube]

  1. schvitzatura

    Keep you day job, Karl…wait, on second thought…

  2. forgracie

    Too early…must…look…away…
    Mmmmm…bottoms….

  3. blger

    Ack. He even screwed up the one potentially (?) humorous joke about tearing the heads off small animals…

  4. mike a

    We’re white guys/And we take no crap/When we deliver our…/white rap!

  5. kungpao

    God it’s so unfunny. Why are conservatives not funny? Is the irony gene attached to empathy gene?

  6. twenty-four hour priapism

    Oh, how I wish he’d dropped an n-bomb to prove his realness.

  7. Dr. Marv

    Oh great, now I know what hell will look like. Thanks.

    I’m going to go boil myself now.

  8. Weezy F Baby

    wow they brought out the Douche Troop from whose line is it anyways? sounds like a rockin’ party, dudes.

  9. RickyBerlin

    White Men Can’t Dance.

  10. DigitalLogic

    I’m not completely sure he was joking when he said he liked to rip the heads off small animals.

  11. bkold

    Wow, this makes me embarrassed to be white…no, American, no, human…

    How did Stephen Colbert do this year?

  12. nonce

    Painful!

  13. thefrontpage

    A bunch of us who saw this have senses of humor, really, and we can accurately say this: This is not funny. It’s pathetic. And it’s really not funny considering the ethical questions that have swirled around this guy for six years. So that’s an excuse for tuxedoed press types to have this guy in a dumb skit? These “dinners” are never funny, never interesting, and are pathetic. It would be better if the press types didn’t feel they have to suck up to government officials, and just had their dinner–without ANY government officials or hack “celebrities.” That would be a real press dinner. Not a dog and pony show.

  14. coolicula

    To state that this pathetic spectacle was not a pretty sight would be a gross understatement! It started off really ugly and then got worse, if that’s possible! The next time he gets the urge to bite the head off of a small animal, I wonder if it could be arranged that it be a poisoned chicken! All in favor, say “Aye”! Karl Rove – A True Geek!

  15. dickthesnake

    Will rebooting make my computer funny again?

    Got…to…put…self…on suicide watch, gaaa.

  16. badbrainbad

    Stunned silence. Crickets chirping.

  17. quint

    It’s a shame I’ll have to get out of this game, did you know Joe Wilson’s wife is Valerie Plame?

  18. NoWireHangers

    Americans find humor in many things:
    1. Evil, corrupt government
    2. Rapping by white people/the elderly/CGI animals
    3. Shots to the groin

  19. Audif Jackson Winters III

    My name is Karl and I’m here to say/ I love unethical push polling in a major way/

  20. The Neoskeptic

    rove screwed up his lines:

    Sherwood: “what’s your name”
    Rove: “Peter Fitzgerald”

    Sherwood: “what do you do at home for fun”
    Rove: “rip the tops off of small animals”

    this was so staged, it makes who’s line is it anyway look spur-of-the-moment. oh, wait….

    no wayne brady?

  21. PeeJay

    Does this mean rap is dead?

  22. katie_a_princess

  23. bambino

    “karl rove makes vanilla ice look like malcolm x”

    surely, another sign of the apocalypse

  24. cockfightbarmitzvah

    Damn MC Rove. Evil Overgrown Baby-Head got back!

  25. Kate Richardson

    Chilling.

  26. 102415

    Whoa! Back up there. I’ve been busy rehabbing the kitchen and all but what happened to Rich Little? I had my heart set on seeing that. Damn, did he get fired too? This is somehow Drew Carey’s fault I just know it.

  27. Anonymous

    I saw about 30 seconds too much of this thing. When I finally recognized Brad Sherwood up there, I couldn’t watch any further. Life is too precious.

  28. inseptiv

    If Obama’s team can get this on TV during the run-up to elections, and then cap it with Obama just looking at the camera glaring in pure justified resentment… he’ll be president thanks to every minority vote flying his way.

  29. gorillavsmarykate

    Katie_a_princess: Thank you for making me spit coffee at my computer screen.

  30. katie_a_princess

    gorilla, your computer screen was already mad at you anyway for playing that clip. well played.

  31. kevcol

    Did you mean the “most honkified flow since Rappin’ RODNEY” Dangerfield?

    “Ronnie” … sheesh … this guy can’t get a break.

  32. Deadly Tango

    What possessed David Gregory to be a back-up dancer for that atrocity?

  33. Christopher R. Weingarten

    Bulworth.

  34. Chris Molanphy

    If Howard Dean’s political future could be derailed by a single scream, this performance should garner Rove an ouster and a year in manacles in the public square.

    Plus. he has to listen to To the Extreme on repeat, nonstop.

  35. FionaScrapple

    This is our counnnntry.

  36. the last engineer

    but more importantly, how will Kanye respond?

  37. Wicked Zoot

    I love the fact that we have to be reminded that the beat-boxin’ dude is a ‘comedian’

  38. konflictofinterest

    …Dude, I… I just….

    For the first time in my life, I’m speechless.

  39. konflictofinterest

    Seriously, though, who the fuck is that dark-skinned, sell-out Sambo back there?

    Seriously. Someone revoke his ghetto pass.

  40. Dunphyetc

    Karl Rove needs to be fired, and not ’cause his flow is heinous (although that phrase could be taken differently once those seven beers kick through him).

    Yeah, he looks exactly like the stereotypical fat, white, middle-aged politico, mincing about, reveling in some self-perceived glory, giddy that should he ever be required to testify on one of his many scandals, he won’t take the oath, there will be no transcribing the conversation, the questioners must begin every inquiry with “mother may I…” and, in fact, all said questioners will be clinically diagnosed as autistic. That’s not why he should be fired.

    He should be fired because HE’S THE PRESIDENT’S CHIEF POLITICAL STRATEGIST! He should have said, “Dubya, if you gracefully bow out of the Correspondent’s Dinner, citing the desire to remain focused on the critical position in Iraq, and don’t make a godawful dumbass of yourself on your one-man-Blue-Collar-Comedy-Tour, you get at least ten, maybe fifteen clicks up in your approval rating!”

    Rove didn’t do that. He was too busy bustin’ rhymes with the Albino Rhinos Of Rap. So he should not be fired for being an embarrassment; he should be fired because he flat-out sucks at his job.

    DwD

  41. “Friends of Governor Palin are saying that she is resigning because she is tired of attacks from the media. Thank God I didn’t say anything.” –David Letterman

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