R. Kelly Is My Mother

jharv | September 18, 2007 1:18 am
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If you’re a regular Idolator reader, you may have read my mom’s list of the 100 greatest R&B singles and gotten a taste of her…unique voice when it comes to talking music. So when Maura found R. Kelly’s Amazon list of “Music You Should Hear” earlier today, we were both somewhat taken aback. It’s not just that Romulus likes the same stuff as my mother–that’s no great surprise–but that they actually kinda sound alike. Some weird separated-at-birth shit. (Well, if not for the age difference.) Here are just a few examples of Kelly’s newfound critical zen:

Stevie Wonder, “Masterblaster (Jammin’)” – There’s a riff on there that is the hardest riff in the world to get. If anyone ever imitated Stevie, then they would have to get this riff. And I don’t know of anyone who ever got the riff, except me, moi.

Donny Hathaway, “The Ghetto” – I’m from the ghetto as they call it, the hood. Hathaway was from the ghetto and saw so many things that it comes through in his voice. It isn’t just a voice, it’s his testimony.

Al Green, “Let’s Stay Together” – He meant it. Pretty much like me, I mean what I say, because Al Green meant what he said. He was talking about us as a people, let’s live, let’s love.

Aretha Franklin, “Natural Woman” – Aretha Franklin – Even when I listen to it today, it’s still wild. I still make the same faces when she riffs, and she riffs like no other. Very soulful, church, party, boogie, and passionate.

Well, he does use fewer exclamation points. Maybe we should get R. Kelly to do our next Top 100 list.

(Wait, what if R. Kelly is my real father? I think I need to lie down.)

See R. Kelly’s List Of Music You Should Hear [Amazon]

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