The president of HMV Canada has some novel (by which I mean batshit) ideas on how to get consumers to feel comfortable buying an album that they could now just as easily steal. Yes, it’s come to this: a written apology for an album’s potential suckiness.
In an effort to secure the number-one position on the Nielsen SoundScan charts across Canada next week, HMV is offering purchasers of the album a free video and ringtone download of Magic’s first single, “Radio Nowhere,” plus a limited-edition lyric booklet – and a personal money-back guarantee from HMV Canada president Humphrey Kadaner that they will love the album.
Blaine Schwingenschlegel, custom marketing manager for Sony BMG Canada, says the idea for the promotion came from Kadaner, a massive Springsteen fan. “Humphrey is so adamant about the quality of this record that not only will he offer a full refund, but he will also send a personal apology letter to anyone who returns it,” he tells MiC. Kadaner has also pledged to donate $1,000 to the Daily Bread Food Bank in anticipation of the record soaring to the top of the charts. If it doesn’t, he’ll donate $2,000.
Listen Canada, don’t think you can just buy back our affection with your kissing of our national treasure’s ass and your refund guarantees and your weird socialistic “charity” after foisting the Biggest Rock Album Of The Century So-Far on us.