Idolator At CMJ, Day Four: What Kind Of Man Reads Brooklyn Vegan?
And it’s definitely dudes. And they definitely have beards. And they really like Black Kids. Feeling like we still hadn’t hit enough blogger parties this week–yes, we know, CMJ is “not about the bloggers”–we spent the afternoon at R Bar drinking overpriced vodka-based cocktails with the folks who bring you all of your favorite MP3 blogs and the faithful who read them every day for their tastemaking tips. Because nothing says “the future of music” like a slightly depressing red mausoleum/tribute to punk rock’s past, with gilded portraits of CBGB’s stars and, as one band noted, way more stripper poles than they were used to.
DEPARTURE: 12:45 p.m.
RETURN HOME: 1:15 a.m.
WEATHER REPORT: Overcast and drizzling/raining, meaning at least we didn’t smoke as much as on previous days.
BANDS SEEN: Five: [Some band whose name we never caught the name of but we wanna say Other Passengers. They weren’t very good], Health (again), Mika Miko, Yeasayer, Black Kids (finally, right?). CMJ total: 27.
CELEBRITIES SIGHTED: Mike D from the Beastie Boys after Black Kids’ set, wide-eyed and wizened and looking like a wrinkly hobbit, lost and frightened in Mordor, trying to escape before any of the hipster orcs noticed who he was.
NUMBER OF PEOPLE SPOTTED IN GIANT RUBBER MONSTER SUITS: Two. One looked like a giant tortoise with eczema and the other resembled a mutant parsnip.
FIRST THING SAID TO US WHEN WE MENTIONED TO SOMEONE THAT WE WERE GOING TO A BROOKLYN VEGAN PARTY: “Well, I hear he’s actually very nice.”
SECOND THING SAID TO US WHEN WE MENTIONED TO SOMEONE ELSE THAT WE WERE GOING TO A BROOKLY VEGAN PARTY: “Make sure you nail that d-bag in the nuts for me.”
BEST COVER: Mika Mika ripping through the Misfits’ “Attitude.”
REALEST TALK OF THE DAY: “I wish they’d just keep playing Misfits songs.”
AMOUNT SPENT RE-PURCHASING THE MISFITS CATALOG FROM ITUNES UPON RETURNING HOME DRUNK: $43
DID WE HEAR SIMIAN MOBILE DISCO AND JUSTICE AND DAFT PUNK SONGS AGAIN?: You betcha, but at least the DJ didn’t play the wack “house edit” of Rage Against The Machine that the doof at the Fader party subjected us to. (That was like listening to dance music die a painful death right in front of you.)
BEST SWAG:Do free Bloody Mary’s count?
WHO ON EARTH GIVES AWAY FREE BLOODY MARY’S?: Brunch joints and blogger parties apparently.
ENERGY DRINKS DRUNK: Zero. We finally swtiched to booze. (See above.) CMJ total: 12.
SUGGESTIONS FOR THE CMJ STAFF: None. After having some guy’s erect penis (honestly, dude!) shoved against our thigh during Black Kids’ set, as the promoters attempted to squeeze as many people into the performance area as possible, we promise never again to complain about bouncers, exclusionary door policies, or turning away people with badges once the crowd gets out of control.
BIGGEST ASSHOLE MOMENT: Guy stage diving off of a table during previously mentioned Misfits cover, sending half the audience (and their drinks) sprawling. We know the usual routine at these shows–arms folded, gentle nod of approval, polite clapping…we’re as guilty as anyone–is definitely lame, but being that guy, the one that tries to start an old-school circle pit in a crowded bar during a friggin’ blog party…not a good look.