DMX To Make Christian Rap (Briefly) Interesting
There are few musical genres less immediately fascinating than Christian rap. Sure, two or three people might wax nostalgic for the 1990 S.F.C. (Soldiers For Christ, obvs) release A Saved Man In The Jungle, but since DC Talk dissolved, there hasn’t been much reason to pay attention to a genre whose reason for existence is dubious, at best. So DMX, I just want to take this moment publicly to thank you for bringing your unique brand of insanity to Team Jesus.
The “prayer track” on DMX’s albums were a topic of a significant amount of discussion, back when people cared, with their odd religious turn, especially immediately following songs entitled “We Don’t Give A F**k”. But, it was a rough 2007 for DMX, with a few arrests and some label drama, so the logical career move would clearly be a “long” double album, featuring an entire disc of “real talk” about Jesus.
“I [was] the first n—a to put out two albums in one year [It’s Dark and Hell Is Hot and Flesh of My Flesh, Blood of My Blood in 1998], now I’m gonna hit ’em again — drop two albums on the same f—in’ day, yo,” X said from his home in Arizona on Friday. “A double album will make mutha—-as mad, because they gotta spend more money — plus it’s already a long [double] album. I’m talking about a hip-hop album and a gospel album.” Combined, the project will be called Walk With Me Now and You’ll Fly With Me Later… The Walk With Me Now portion will be dedicated to straight-up, raw raps, while the latter will feature his non-secular undertaking. As for the gospel album, X noted that the lyrics will be “without cursing — how ’bout that one? No songs about b—-es, no songs about robbing, just straight ‘Give God the glory.'”
While I realize that I’m treading on thin intellectual ice criticizing the marketing decisions of the staff of DMX’s new label/online gambling/mixed martial arts enterprise, Bodog Music, you have to wonder if packaging these albums together is the best sales move. The odd preaching might have been tolerable or even amusing as one skippable track on one of his string of number one debuts, but someone forgot to hand DMX the popular guide “How To Resurrect Your Music Career With The Help Of Jesus”, or he forgot to read it. Part of the deal is that the Christian market expects you to stop doing tracks that are about “b—-es” or “robbing” alongside your full-list price praise, and it might help to stop referring to your potential customers as “mutha—-as”. Just a hint, dog.
Until DMX gets his act/somewhat depressing career move sorted out, the CCM rap market will have to settle for white dudes rapping about Mountain Dew.