I put my own dick in my mouth. I was 14 and much more flexible at the time. It was soft and required a lot of pulling. I really wanted that case of beer.
I could sit here and tell you how Nickelback’s music already reminds me of dudes straining to self-pleasure themselves in front of an audience–hunched over, sweaty, flaccid, embarrassing. But I’d rather use my time to complain that there’s no version of UGK’s “I’m So Bad (I Can Suck My Own Dick)” on YouTube that I can link to.
Chad reveals saucy party trick [The Sun via our pal Reed Fischer]