Sperm-For-Tickets Website Unable To Handle Load Of Requests From Spunky Hopefuls

Jess Harvell | March 14, 2008 12:45 pm
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Alas, the great semen-for-seats experiment of ’08 may have finished a little prematurely; it turns out that Sperm For Tickets, the organization which offered tickets to any major European music festival in exchange for the stuff of life, all thanks to record low sperm counts at Irish fertility clinics, did not account for the number of young men who would instantly pop off an email in hopes they could score, demand rubbing the plan out before it even managed to come to fruition. Also the whole thing is now rumored to have been a hoax perpetrated by Irish college kids, highlighting yet another difference between the values instilled by European and American higher education, as U.S. students would have laughed heartily at cooking up such a hilarious prank, only to have wiped it from their short-term with bong hits by Squidbillies time. [Gigwise]