Phyllis Schlafly Still Alive, Not A Kimya Dawson Fan

lesskimyadawsonmoremotthehoople.jpgGoogle searching for material occasionally leads you to some odd places, and today it took me to Human Events, a publication that apparently has been “leading the conservative moment since 1944″ for a Phyllis Schlafly review of the movie everyone was talking about several months ago, Juno! It turns out that Phyllis and I, despite otherwise sharing zero in the way of opinions, both disliked the film, but in the midst of an anti-feminist screed, there was one delightful, sorta music-related paragraph. So, you’ve probably been wondering…what does an 83 year old ERA foe think is wrong with today’s youth? Well, she’d be happy to tell you!

America is in bad shape if the financial success of this movie reflects today’s high school culture: sexual activity without marriage, crude pictures on the walls, vulgar language, a girl smoking a pipe, unattractive clothes, uncombed hair, enjoyment of slasher movies and weird music, and marriage breakup.

While I was a bit puzzled by Mark’s endorsement of the Carpenters’ tribute record as anyone, but to equate the music (outside of the truly tedious Kimya Dawson) with a girl smoking a pipe seems unfair. So, we leave it to you the reader…which of these teenage threats is most likely to destroy our beloved America?

Gawker Media polls require Javascript; if you’re viewing this in an RSS reader, click through to view in your Javascript-enabled web browser.

Feminist “Juno” Unfit For Family Award [Human Events]

  • Anonymous

    You just know this topic comes up frequently at the 4:30 pm dinner discussion at Bob Evans.

  • BakerStreetSaxSolo

    going well so far:

    Sexual activity without marriage, vulgar language and marriage breakup combined:
    0.0% (0 votes)

    Uncombed hair:
    37.5% (6 votes)

  • ObtuseIntolerant

    I have to say, I voted for language…only because I have a lot of contact with tweens and the vulgarity (from cursing to the pure endorsement of insensitivity on every level) they are picking up on YouTube, etc., is translating into them thinking they can get away with anything on the internet and it’s totally frightening and socially-destructive.

    Other than that, I give the kids a big thumbs up – they are way more with it in a lot of other ways than we were.

    PSA over.

  • Jess Harvell

    voted for the pipe, obvs. just unseemly.

  • SuperUnison

    @Jess Harvell: Seriously. Vaporizers are for the children.

  • Dick Laurent is dead.

    Unattractive clothing, obviously.

  • Twilly

    Hair. Let’s shower and use a comb people.

    Maybe a little product. It won’t kill you.

  • cassidy2099

    Crude pictures? You mean teenagers are now engaging in unsupervised art projects?

  • Clevertrousers

    Anyone smoking a pipe is annoying because it reminds me of the man who touched me that time in the 4th grade.

  • bcapirigi

    what kind of a pipe are we talking about?

  • queensissy

    @Clevertrousers: or Mammy Yokum.

  • Anonymous

    But she wasn’t even smoking the pipe, right? Is my memory going, or did she just have an unlit pipe in her mouth to be “quirky.”