The R. Kelly trial is slowly trickling into being, with the first day of jury selection taking place yesterday. The trial needs 16 jurors in total, and so far, three have been picked!
The jurors who will be subjected to a number of Sexfacts previously inconceivable:
- An African-American woman whose husband is a Baptist pastor, and who lives in the same Chicago suburb as Kells.
- An African-American man who was only familiar with “I Believe I Can Fly”, and dislikes seeing pornography behind the counter at 7-Eleven.
- The white “vice president of national accounts for an unnamed company” who believes Kelly is guilty, but who also believes he can provide him a fair trial.
Sadly, the woman who described Kelly as “a musical genius” and “the pied piper” was not selected; nor was a gentleman of advanced age who stated that “My son says nature already provided an age of consent–puberty. It made sense to me.” With those sort of standards, how are they ever going to find 16 people to fill that jury box?
In case this trial never actually happens, there’s always the festivities as imagined on TV’s The Boondocks.
3 Kelly jurors picked 1st day [Chicago Sun-Times]