Your Guns N’ Roses Non-News Update

May 15th, 2008 // 12 Comments

AP071105028147.jpgGuns N’ Roses to release new album next month! Duff McKagan talkin’ about a reunion! Not really and not really, but with Axl, news is news even when it’s not news. First off, Guns N’Roses is re-releasing Greatest Hits in England on June 2, just in time for Father’s Day. And that’s not a coincidence, as the press release notes: “it’s most definitely the only album of choice for any serious rockfather.” Actually, any serious rockfather already has Appetite For Destruction and doesn’t need to sully his ears with that remake of “Sympathy For The Devil,” whether he’s enduring an hour-long commute or enjoying a beer in the backyard with his feet in a kiddie pool.

Meanwhile, TV host Paul Heyman cornered Duff McKagan on a red carpet and suggested the band could at least reunite for one night. Duff muttered and said the word “myriad,” and Heyman moved on to ogling the breasts of Duff’s wife, cleavage enthusiast Susan Holmes. Heyman seems to be under the impression that Weiland’s heroin habit has caused Velvet Revolver to break up. (Obviously, he doesn’t read our breathless Revolvadrama coverage. Which is cool, as this is the first time I’ve ever heard of “The Heyman Hustle.”)

So yeah, nothing’s changed in regards to Chinese Democracy in the slightest. But we’re hoping it will be revealed that Slash would be up for a game of badminton with his former bandmate, or that Dizzy Reed has signed onto the STP reunion, in time for a post later today.

Guns N’ Roses to release album for Father’s Day… [NME]
Heyman Hustle Episode 13 [YouTube]

  1. MayhemintheHood

    The Discharge patch on his jeans pisses me off for some reason. Probably because they’re $350 couture pants that came with all that crap on it, and he’s never heard Never Again or Hear Nothing, See Nothing, Say Nothing.

  2. Charlie Kerfelds Jetsons Tee

    @MayhemintheHood: I’ve always been under the impression that Duff’s punk pedigree is pretty legit.

    That being said, those pants are fucking stupid.

  3. Maura Johnston

    @MayhemintheHood: dude, he was the fastbacks’ second drummer! respect.

  4. Ned Raggett

    @Maura Johnston: dude, he was the fastbacks’ second drummer! respect.

    Hell yeah. I think I’ve got the CD with his stuff on there…

    As for whoever that is with him in the photo, could she be any more obvious.

  5. MayhemintheHood

    I know he’s probably the most punk of all GnR members. But still…those pants suck. He could’ve been the original singer from Discharge and I’d chide him. He was punk rocker at one point of his life, but not any more.

  6. FionaScrapple

    Boobies!!

  7. King of Pants

    ECDUB! ECDUB!

    /wrestling nerd
    //shows self out

  8. Silverfuture

    @King of Pants: Totally. I’m glad to see Hayman has bunced back a bit after leaving the wrestling.

  9. Silverfuture

    @Silverfuture: or even that Paul Heyman has bounced back

  10. Anonymous

    He cannot POSSIBLY be satisfying her in the bedroom.

  11. metalkate

    amazingly, she seems as stupid as he is. i feel bad that she has to
    be intersulted by a douchebag, but she should call him on it or…
    something! anything! i saw some super hot spontaneously funny chick on
    that chelsea handler woman’s show the other day, so it’s entirely
    possible.

  12. Anonymous

    Hate the Chad Kroeger hair. Bring back the Aqua-Net, Duff. You know you want to.

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