How To Navigate Through Next Week’s Glutted Release Schedule: Let’s Play A Game Of Buy/Download/Kill

noah | November 21, 2008 11:00 am

Between the forever-in-the-making epics and the tossed-off odes to sadness and the crazy ’80s radio pastiche and a bunch of other albums, next week is going to be something of a big one for the music business. How should one navigate their way through the music-consumption choices they’ll be forced to make next week? Might I suggest a friendly game of Buy/Download/Kill, in which each album receives one of the three fates outlined by the game’s title. My personal preferences after the jump.

BUY Guns N’ Roses, Chinese Democracy Hey, writing about Axl Rose’s magnum opus has paid my bills for the last two years and change. The least I could do is give back.

Kanye West, 808s & Heartbreak: It may be the most divisive album to come out this year, if only because West is one of the few artists left who has a wide-enough fanbase to split through the power of his aesthetic decisions. But you know what? The more I listen, the more I’m coming out on the “pro” side.

The Killers, Day & Age: But wait until it’s discounted to The Nice Price.

DOWNLOAD Ludacris, Theater Of The Mind: Because it’ll have at least one instance of Ludacris rolling up his vowels and his consonants in a way that drives me wild.

Barry Manilow, The Greatest Songs Of The ’80s: This would go in the “kill” section were it not for the presence of a Journey cover, which I’m going to have to hear at least once for sick curiosity’s sake.

The Fireman, Electric Arguments: That first single was straight, um, fire, but one only has so many hours in a day.

KILL Trace Adkins, X (Ten): Not only did he have to explain that the “X” in his title isn’t a reference to sleaze, but a nod to this being his 10th album, any success this album might have will probably result in him recording another awful between-innings anthem. (I suspect others might agree, as country isn’t exactly flying off the shelves this year. Unless it’s being sung by sparkly-guitar-wielding girls, that is.)

Scott Weiland, “Happy” In Galoshes: Because dude needs help infinitely more than he needs SoundScans.

Nov. 25, 2008 [Pause & Play] [Thanks to Defamer for the inspiration]