A tipster turned us on to this amazing bit of press releasespeak today, which was couched as a pitch for a company that’ll remain nameless for obvious reasons: “When the news that Chris Brown had been arrested for alleged assault, I couldn’t help but think that independent music artists are the way of the future. An independent artist has a lot more at risk and (I believe) appreciates their fame a lot more than someone signed by a music production company. Could that be the problem with today’s artists who make stupid mistakes to mess up their career?” That’s a justification for staying indie if I’ve ever read it!
Let me recap: Chris Brown (allegedly) abused Rihanna because he is on a major label, and thus doesn’t appreciate his fame. Had he been an independent artist, he would have raised his hand to her and then lowered it, having thought twice about the ramifications of such an action and the risks he was taking with his career. Never mind the physical abuse he was going to cause another human being. What matters is that he appreciate his fame. Those music production companies are bad! Stay away! Independent music really is the way of the future. Everyone appreciates everything they have and nobody makes stupid mistakes like beating up their girlfriends because they think about the risks they are taking.
Huh. Maybe it’s that I’ve been mixing Dayquil and Sudafed today, but this all makes total sense to me. Yep. No problems with it at all.