Freestyle Music Park: If It’s Too Nauseating, You’re Too Old

noah | May 19, 2009 11:30 am
The rebranding of the befallen-by-bankruptcy Hard Rock Park concludes this Saturday, when Freestyle Music Park opens its doors in Myrtle Beach, S.C. Above, an ad for the park and its sickness-inducing Time Machine Coaster. Will the promise of getting one’s hair and innards completely whipsawed around result in people snapping up enough $29.95 tickets to at least keep the park open until Labor Day? Well, given the promise of throwing up offered by the ad above and the fact that one of the new “premier attractions” is something called CSI: Live!–it “incorporates cutting-edge forensic science, unparalleled audience interaction and amazing visual effects into a fast-paced production”–I’m going to guess that the park’s success is going to be directly correlated to how much it’s planning to spend on cleanup crews for guests’ vomit. [YouTube]