News Of Jonas Brother’s Engagement Sends Many Systems Into Overload

Jul 2nd, 2009 // 11 Comments

As of this writing, there are 4,168 comments on the blog post announcing Kevin Jonas’ engagement to his longtime girlfriend Danielle Deleasa. (It was written by the parents of Kevin and his fellow Jonas Brothers Joe and Nick.) As you might expect, the reactions from the MySpace faithful that have come in since the news broke last night have been somewhat mixed! A sampling after the jump.


Of course, there was skepticism:

was this a joke? orrr? did their myspace get hacked?

omfg.



And dark clouds on the horizon, like this quote from Mikaela, a.k.a. The Slightly Optimistic Doomsayer:

Everybody’s right, this is going to change the Jonas Brothers forever. Kevin’s going to move out, have kids, drop out of tours to be with his family, and Joe, he wants to move out, and soon enough, he will. And Nick, you’re not exactly effected enough, but, just so you know, I’m still in the process of figuring out how in the world I’ll ever meet you, so I can be your Danielle. But, whatever. I hope you all the best in this marriage, and it’s truly sad to say that the Jonas Brothers are never going to be the same. I’m not saying this is a bad thing, I’m really happy for you, but it kills me. I’m still in shock. But it’s your life, bub, and you gotta do what you gotta do. And for whoever said that there’s going to be a ‘Jonas sister’, what the heck? Wow, a Jonas sister-in-law. I’m just glad you proved to us, or at least me, who doesn’t think she’s famous, that you really do date fans, and I’m excited to think I have a shot with Nicholas.

See? Upside! The boy band dream still lives!


Next up we have Ally Gruber, a.k.a. The Person With The Slightly Off iTunes Library:

…To quote Shania, “Well if it makes you happy, it can’t be that bad.”
If it makes Kevin happy, we should all be happy, even if just because he’s happy.

But Ally… does that piece of wisdom still hold if it comes from Sheryl Crow? We must know immediately!


And now, a note from Sexx Me Nick Jonas©*New Name.*1.2k, who means well, but whose name will probably result in her request being ignored:

im so happpy for them..can i please come to the wedding?????….you all are the inspiration to mee…..it means alot that they care about their fans.becasue if i was their friend i would do anything for those boys and now ..Danielle Deleasa. i am happy she is now apart of the jonas family…..



But at least she’s not out-and-out threatening, like NEW NAME COMMING SOON [KEVIN GETTING MARRIED]:

..IF THIS RUINS THE JONAS BROTHERS, I WILL SLIT HER THROAT MYSELF!
LOVE YOU KEVIN, AND MAYBE I WILL LEARN TO LIKE HER…AFTER I A M OVER THE SHOCK…



And finally, from ♥ Nichoals [sic!] Jonas Fan Site [Offical], a.k.a. The Brutally Practical One:

So if you get a divorce can you just like fuck anyone?

-I mean congratulations. :)



Annnd I think we should end it there. Even though there are 70 pages of comments to go.


From Kevin Sr. and Denise Jonas [Jonas Brothers' MySpace Blog]

idolator

  1. I read on a JoBro site somewhere that “Danielle Deleasa really knows how to scrape the mold off the bread, if you know what I mean, and I think you do…”

  2. Dude is taking his life into his hands, crossing the tween girl fans. They are completely psychotic (all tween girls, not just Jonas fans). I quite seriously hope he and his soon to be wife have good security.

  3. Is he sure he’s not really engaged to Haylie Duff? They look like the SAME PERSON.

  4. I just laughed so hard that I cried, Maura.

    Kudos to you purely for your bravery in reading Jonas Brothers MySpace blog post comments. I had to stop doing that with them a long, long time ago.

    Honestly, they have been starting to try to go against the marriageable-teen-idol grain for a little bit now. Seeing as the Black Eyed Peas are back at #1 this week in album sales…well…meh, whatever, I think it’s still for the best. :)

  5. Has Andrew Sullivan weighed in on this news yet?

  6. THIS IS WORSE THAN 9/11.

    Kidding.

    Good luck to ‘em. But if this had been an announcement that Joe was getting married you’d have to talk me off the ledge.

  7. @NeverEnough: Um. Samesies. (Sorry, Kev.) Though if their non-Jonas bass player remained single, I’d still have a lil hope…

  8. @ObtuseIntolerant: Garbo makes me feel all rapey.

  9. “To quote Shania, “Well if it makes you happy, it can’t be that bad.”” is probably the funniest quote i’ve seen on the internet since an Estonian guy posted “I came to rock house. I WANT to rock house” on the music forum I frequent three weeks ago.

  10. Ally

    Oh. My. God.

    hahahahhahahahahahahahha.

    I just typed my name into google and found this. I am Ally Gruber. THE Ally Gruber, as is quoted in the article.

    I can not believe I did that with the names! Holy crap. I can’t stop laughing now.
    I know that the song was written by Sheryl Crow. I guess I was typing so fast that my fingers were going faster than my brain and I wrote Shania instead of Sheryl.

    I seriously love my life right now.
    Hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha.

    thank you, for posting this, by the way. the best laugh of my life came from my own words–figures.

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