Nicole Westbrook’s “It’s Thanksgiving” Is Already The Greatest Song Of All Time

Move over, Rebecca Black‘s “Friday”: There’s a new viral phenomenon burning up on YouTube, and it comes courtesy of tween songbird Nicole Westbrook, who has single-handedly saved the music industry from certain collapse with her soon-to-be-smash “It’s Thanksgiving.”

The track, which has reportedly already forced Adele and Beyonce into retirement for fear that they simply couldn’t compete with Westbrook’s dulcet vocals and searingly brilliant songcraft, celebrates the most magical time of year: Thanksgiving. And this year, there’s more to be thankful for than ever — now that Westbrook has taken her throne as the true Queen of Pop with this instant classic. Counting down the holidays of the year as well as traditional Thanksgiving fare (“Mashed potatoes — ay!”) while singing into a drumstick microphone, the track instantly and effortlessly renders all other music irrelevant and unlistenable.

“It’s Thanksgiving” was penned by Patrice Wilson, the hitmaker who gave the world “Friday” (as well as a host of other non-charting low-quality tween-performed singles), which is actually disappointing: “It’s Thanksgiving” would be so much more inspiring if it had the same magical unintentional misery of “Friday,” rather than being an obvious ploy for viral attention. Wilson himself makes an unexpected cameo halfway through the clip (he’s the guy who looks like Flo Rida‘s dad), harmonizing inexplicably with the future superstar, which is just the icing on the turkey — or whatever.

But even if it’s a cynical hits-grab capitalizing upon the public’s insatiable hunger for risible trash-pop, we’re buying it. There’s only one tune that will be burning up the playlist this holiday season — and we’re so grateful to have been given the gift of “It’s Thanksgiving.”