The ladies have returned from last night’s birthday and diva performances to face the results of voting. With so few contestants remaining, the smallest slip-up during a performance could spell doom for any one of these contestants. We get treated to a clip of Randy Jackson proclaiming this to be the best top five ever and I suspect he’s said that every season at this point. I predict that next season, Randy will be replaced by a Teddy Ruxpin-like robot that just spits out recorded phrases of his from the past decade or so.
Of course, a results show wouldn’t be complete without some performances. The American Idol stage was graced by Season 2′s runner-up, Clay Aiken, as well as Season 3 winner, Fantasia Barrino. All right, so let’s dive into these results!
The show kicks off with a “diva medley” from the songs of the late, great Donna Summer. Awww. RIP, bad girl. Amber Holcomb looks particularly confident in a pair of black shorts that show off her killer gams.
Good lord, this Ford Fiesta product placement is almost as lame as the Coca-Cola BS with Carly Rae Jepsen. The girls have to go on a super-staged scavenger hunt that involves a “chance” meeting with Glee‘s Matthew Morrison. After the ridiculousness ends, we return to see the girls seated and waiting to hear some results.
Ryan Seacrest starts by pulling Angie Miller aside and we get a reminder montage of how she did last night. Jimmy Iovine always finds Angie’s believability to be wanting. I tend to agree, but I did love her rendition of “Halo.” Nicki Minaj vehemently disagrees with Jimmy as well.
Next, Ryan pulls Candice Glover up to center stage and we are treated a reminder of how she did last night. Jimmy was totally impressed with Candice’s combined performances. Randy and Ryan have a little banter where they pretend that they tried to reach out to Paula Abdul to see what she thought of Candice’s rendition of “Straight Up” but couldn’t get a hold of her on Twitter, her phones, blah, blah, blah.
Then, we are treated to a straight up surprise appearance by Paula, who sneaks to the stage in a sassy red dress. It’s actually quite sweet to hear Ms. Abdul thank Candice for singing her song. She is gracious and as hokey as it is for her to take a seat on the judges seat for a moment.
“Now that’s an image I can scratch off my bucket list right there,” Ryan declares. I’m assuming he’s not referring to Nicki’s black G-string peeking out from her jeans when she bows down to Paula. But who knows?
We get a reminder of Clay Aiken’s career path in the decade since his stint on Idol. We learn about his various goodwill projects, and I have to say that he was a dear on Celebrity Apprentice, so I’m totally buying it. He performs a fan favorite, “Bridge Over Troubled Water.” I’m having trouble focusing on Clay’s performance, as I am completely mesmerized by the undulating black and white striped legs of one of his background singers.
Janelle Arthur is next up and Jimmy thinks she’s in danger tonight of going home. Despite this, she gets a special note from Dolly Parton herself with some kudos.
Next, Amber struts her stuff over to Ryan. The montage captures her two performances from last night, including her amazing rendition of “What Are You Doing With The Rest Of Your Life?” Jimmy thinks she kicked butt and I certainly hope America agrees because she’s definitely in my top three.
Kree joins Mr. Seacrest and we are reminded of how she did last night. Jimmy felt Kree’s choices were off.
And now, it’s time for a visit from past American Idol winner, Fantasia Barrino. We get treated to some amazing vintage footage of Jennifer Hudson, Fantastia and LaToya London, of the “three divas” fame. The latter is working on an album and isn’t at all bitter that J-Hud and Fantasia have been getting all the attention since their season. I kid! She looks great and is working on an album.
LaToya kicks it off from the audience to Fantasia on stage with a cheer of, “Go, ‘tasia!” Fantasia performs her single, “Lose To Win.” I must ask, are Fantastia’s eyes always so animated? If so, I need to get a ticket to a concert, stat. As she’s singing so passionately, I’m reminded of why the best singers have the worst personal lives. With that trembling lip at the end, I want to stand up like Keith Urban and the rest of the judges. Go, ‘tasia!
We return from commercial break and the lights are dimmed. Candice is the first to be called out as a contestant who is safe. Then, Angie takes a stool next to Candice. The next safe contestant is Amber. The only two remaining in danger of having to sing for a save are Kree and Janelle, representing the bottom two. I sure never thought I’d see Kree in this spot. If Kree goes home, I’d like to apologize in advance to my neighbors for the uncontrollable wailing.
The person who has to sing is announced as Janelle. As much as Ms. Arthur seems like a total sweetie, I am glad to see Kree stick around to sing another day. Janelle’s song is her unique version of “You Keep Me Hanging On.” The judges confer intently throughout the entire performance among themselves.
Unfortunately for Janelle, she doesn’t get the save. She takes it like a champ, with the rest of the girls surrounding her. We get a montage of her emerging from her first audition with a golden ticket and I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t a little teary-eyed to see she and her buddy Kree giving each other hugs and looking genuinely sad.
Awww. Goodbye, Janelle. We’ve only got four ladies left still alive and kicking in this competition. Until next week…