Pop Perspective: Zayn & Taylor Swift’s “I Don’t Wanna Live Forever” Rated & Reviewed

Robbie Daw | December 9, 2016 1:13 pm

At Idolator, the editors share a passion for high-quality pop. Occasionally, our tastes align. Other times, not so much. So, in the spirit of debate (and online drama), we’ve developed a recurring feature called Pop Perspective. In a nutshell, our editors dissect a particularly noteworthy pop-happening, and give it a rating out of 10. That way you’re getting a full spectrum of views and we can all vent. (It’s cheaper than therapy!)

The latest event to be dragged under the Idolator microscope is Zayn Malik and Taylor Swift’s surprise Fifty Shades Darker single “I Don’t Wanna Live Forever.” Will this be the smash that keeps the heat turned up all winter long or is it more like a bad one-night stand you’d rather forget? Read our thoughts below.

Robbie Daw — 5/10

Being an all around professional, I have a strict litmus test when rating any Fifty Shades-related song: Would I masturbate to it? Unfortunately, this thing dropped in the wee hours of the night, so I was too tired and bleary-eyed to try. And so I’m left with judging this surprise duet on its own merit.

Bottom line: It’s no “Style” or “Pillowtalk,” but I’m sure it will be drilled into our collective consciousness with millions of plays out of every available speaker over the next seven months, until ultimately we just submit. Sexy!

Rachel Sonis — 4/10

Meh. I think I’m going to just go back and listen to The Weeknd’s “Earned It” instead.

Christina Lee — 2/10

The only sex I can imagine happening to new Taylor Swift + ZAYN is between two mewling cats.

Carl Williott — 3/10

This could’ve been anyone. And that’s why so much of Taylor Swift’s pop fare bothers me — it’s anonymous. She’s an avatar of contemporaneous pop trends, an alien mimicking what a human pop-maker sounds like. Plus, she and producer Jack Antonoff are just about two of the most un-sexy pop performers out there, so I have no idea why they were tasked with writing a sultry S&M companion piece in the first place. It was a given that they’d end up with something this stiff.

As for Zayn, on the chorus he sounds like Sam Smith — the bad, James Bond song Sam Smith. All in all, this is focus-grouped, calculated, safe pop at its most forgettable.

AVERAGE SCORE: 3.5/10

Did we get it wrong with Zayn and Taylor’s hot new fuck track? Let us know your thoughts below!