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Idolator’s Top 12 Pop Songs About The Internet

wwwTrey Songz’ ode to sexy Twitpics “LOL :)” is the latest in a long line of songs to marvel over modern technology as it talks about love and romance; with the emoticon-addled track, Songz (and assistants Soulja Boy and Gucci Mane) joins a long line of Internet-referencing pop superstars that includes Prince, Britney Spears, Todd Rundgren, and Nick Carter’s little brother. There are so many of these songs, in fact, that it would be a crime to not count at least a few of them down—after all, the only thing denizens of the Internet like more than lists are lists that reference the Internet. After the jump, Idolator’s top 12 songs that bridge the gap between the radio tower and the information superhighway. More »

Monica Celebrates Forthcoming Reality Show With Kate Gosselin-Inspired Haircut

youneedtogiveitupR & B singer Monica’s forthcoming show on BET—simply titled Monica, and debuting Oct. 27—will only have her raising two kids instead of the spiky-haired Kate’s eight, but she’ll also be working on her long-in-the-works album and trying to launch a clothing line, which I guess are supposed to compensate? I’m hoping for a crossover episode, if only so we can see what happens when two instances of that not-quite-a-mullet are in the same room together. [PR Newswire; HT Toya’s World] More »

Jay-Z, Kanye, Fact, And Fiction Collide At Webster Hall

3774454801_a35f714e8eLast night’s Diesel : U : Music show at Webster Hall was a hot ticket, thanks to a bill stocked with highly bloggable acts like Clipse and the Roots, and rumors swirling all week that Jay-Z—in the tri-state area for his All Points West appearance this evening—was going to surprise the crowd by bringing the house down. We sent Jeff Rosenthal of ItsTheReal.com to suss out the rumors and scope out the scene; as it turned out, Jay didn’t show up, but one of his town-running cohorts did. More »

The Pussycat Dolls Throw A Hail Mary Pass

hernameisfeaturingLast night’s Critical Karaoke event was pretty rousing success, and thanks to everyone who came out. Apparently there will be video of the whole night online soon (which is a good thing, because everyone’s performances were stellar), but for now my piece—which looks at the Pussycat Dolls’ current attempt to recapture the zeitgeiest, “Hush Hush; Hush Hush”—is after the jump, with a video so you can listen to the song while reading along, as the performative nature of the evening dictated. Just imagine it being read by someone whose arms are flailing a lot. More »

Chris Brown Follows Jill And Kevin’s Wedding Procession To The Charts

foreverrrrThe viral-video sensation that was the Chris Brown-scored wedding procession of Kevin Heinz and Jill Peterson has resulted in “Forever,” the song employed by the clip, returning to the charts: It sold 50,000 downloads in the week ending July 26 (Sunday)—a 1,721% jump, which was enough to put the song at No. 21 on Billboard‘s sales-derived Hot Digital Songs chart. (Because of rules about songs’ ages, the track isn’t eligible to re-enter the Hot 100.) Given that “Forever”‘s chart position at iTunes and Amazon has held—it’s currently at Nos. 22 and 6 on those digital-music outlets’ respective singles rundowns—it’ll probably be on next week’s chart as well. Meanwhile, some Internet yuksters have decided to see how the couple will use “Forever” in a viral video a few years from now… More »

Eminem Continues To Lose Himself In His Beef With Mariah Carey

eminemIn an effort to keep everyone’s name in the gossip columns set the record straight about his prior involvements with Mariah Carey, Eminem has released “The Warning,” a few minutes of invective pointed directly at the floundering singer and her semi-courageous husband Nick Cannon, who have been acting cute about whether the Mimi-crazed guy played by Mariah in her video for “Obsessed” is actually supposed to represent one Marshall Mathers. It would seem as if Em isn’t really believing their denials! “The Warning” talks about the trajectory of Mariah and Em’s “relationship” (complete with self-mockery over his sexual prowess), drops in coos from a Mimi soundalike, and throws down a few threats over the release of photos and voicemails that would apparently prove that the two were an item for a while, contrary to Carey’s assertions. Embed after the jump. More »

Shakira Is A Total Freaking Goofball (And It’s Kind Of Great)

shewolf1There is something about Shakira’s disco-twitchy single “She Wolf” that makes me giggle. Maybe it’s the lyrical use of “lycanthropy,” or the way she delicately caterwauls “aa-woo” on the chorus? Or both, and add to that the way that her voice on the chorus is stripped of all the barkiness that characterized so much of what I didn’t like about her previous material. Anyway, the video is just as kooky as the track, with the hip-shaking singer escaping the confines of her boring old marital bed in order to shake her booty while caged, in a club, and, er, trapped in some sort of organ. (I think it’s the heart. I hope it’s the heart.) Clip after the jump. More »

klunch_0527In case you have no plans tonight and you find yourself in or adjacent to the Red Hook area of Brooklyn, N.Y.: I will be performing at the Jalopy Theater (315 Columbia St.) tonight as part of “Critical Karaoke,” in which music scribes perform a piece that’s written to the length of the song they’re writing about; also on the bill are Michaelangelo Matos, Robert Christgau, Rob Sheffield, Rob Harvilla, among others. The song I’m going to discuss is by an act that’s a frequent topic of conversation around these parts, although it’s probably not the act you’re thinking of right now. Showtime’s 9 p.m. Come down! (I’ll post the piece tomorrow, for those of you who are geographically challenged.) [Jalopy Theater] More »

The Swine Flu’s Latest Victim: Communal Beer

swinefluThose people the Wacken Open Air Festival in Germany have been told to hold off on kissing other concertgoers and sharing drinks in order to help stifle potential for a swine flu outbreak, thanks to the disease rapidly spreading in the area of Germany where the festival is happening. The local health ministry cites “circumstances of limited hygiene” at the festival—which is expected to draw 75,000 people for sets by the likes of Motörhead, Testament, and GWAR—as the main reason behind its suggestions. In honor of these poor, trapped, hygiene-deprived fans, here are five swine flu-themed songs. (They’re not metal, because not being able to split a beer with your pals is not metal, either.) More »

Courtney Love Is Not All That Convinced By Taylor Momsen

myspace-presents-taylor-momsen-s-large-msg-124889664333Gossip Girl starlet / aspiring rocker Taylor Momsen turned 16 earlier this week, and she’s finally received her birthday gift from Courtney Love: A big old stream of invective over her basically inviting comparisons to the former Hole singer with her sartorial choices of blonde mop, red lipstick, eyeliner, and baby-doll dresses. Love, apparently sent over the edge by reports from a show by Momsen’s band, The Pretty Reckless, that name-dropped her as much as they did Momsen’s Gossip Girl co-stars, let her Tweet flag fly at near Momsen last night: More »

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