Spice Girls Make An Announcement That They Are Going To Make An Announcement

Jun 22nd, 2007 // 15 Comments

Fresh off the wire:

The Spice Girls have set a date to announce their “future plans.”

“Following weeks of speculation, the Spice Girls are set to make an official announcement to the world regarding future plans on Thursday, June 28,” said a statement by their management company, 19 Entertainment.

“Details regarding the announcement will be released in the coming days,” said the statement, released Friday.

Future plans? We wonder if those plans will include Emma Bunton changing her spice name from “Baby” to “Still The Youngest, But Over 30 So ‘Baby’ Doesn’t Seem All That Appropriate, Does It.”

Spice Girls Set Date to Reveal Plans [AP via Washington Post]

Introducing Our Favorite New Nonsensical Music Critic

Jun 22nd, 2007 // 17 Comments

You can find plenty of heated opinions about the Smashing Pumpkins marketing plan over at the message board ateaseweb.com, and this one is our favorite:

The sensational pumpkins and pitchfork can inhale my penis of ten inches! Both.of.them is horrible insults to which it is good in music! Memory to buy one ton of albums of pitchfork and PISSED that aspired. I mean, is perhaps the lost set in the thing of the translation that ignites, but these are not good albums. The Fire Of the Arches? My tea purse is not thankful to him!

In any case this does not surprise to me. Billy Corgan (also known like old girl four years that obtains violet in the ass) is a money that digs to puta corporative. Steve correct Albini when he said that they were like the following foreigner! Now mírelos that tries to be a bandage.

Well of the Oh. That bassist was quite hot and Siamese dream is an obvious wonderful album. So perhaps I do not think that they are that bad one. Even if Mr. Corgan still sounds like dinosaurio of great energies with the incapacity to crush people!

It’s either a Babel Fish translation gone awry, or a parody of lost-in-translation message-board posts (we’ll bet on the latter, but hope for the former). Either way, it’s a meme just waiting to happen.

Smashing Pumpkins [atease.web]

Now You Know Who To Blame

Jun 22nd, 2007 // 6 Comments

byline.jpgThose of you who read the site via some sort of RSS thingee may have noticed that the posts now feature bylines; this way, you’ll finally be able to tell which one of us is a freestyle-loving grunge archivist, and which one is the lame duck who spends his remaining days writing the shortest, easiest entries possible (like this one). It’s a public-service effort for the estimated .03 percent of you who actually care.

Our Advertisers Are Hoping That Carlos D’s Dog Comes Out Of Hiding Soon

Jun 22nd, 2007 // Comment

Many thanks to this week’s sponsors, who are hoping that Kelly Clarkson plays a house show near them sometime this summer. If you’d like to join this motley crue, you can find more information here.

American Apparel
Beastie Boys
Converse
Eagle vs. Shark
Erasure
Flight of the Conchords
Live from Abbey Road
MSN Live Earth
Reyka Vodka
Sprint
USA’s Burn Notice

Interpol Heads For The Hills

Jun 22nd, 2007 // 9 Comments

olta.jpgARTIST: Interpol
TITLE: Our Love To Admire
WEB DEBUT: June 22, 2007
RELEASE DATE: July 10, 2007
SOUND QUALITY: 160 kbps
ONE-LISTEN VERDICT: Yes, Admire is Interpol’s first album on a major label, but all of the New York band’s stylistic tics–reach-to-the-sky guitars, minor-key gloom–are intact on its third record. The only new wrinkle on this album comes in the form of more production (horns, guitars overdubbed so that they sound like a full-on orchestra). Which is, funnily enough, slightly problematic: The songs have an odd in-one-ear-out-the-other quality that made us go back for a second run through the album, mainly to see if we’d missed anything on first listen.
WHERE TO FIND THE BEST TRACK: i rock i roll has an MP3 of the sprawling album opener “Pioneer To The Falls.” (Hype Machine also has a stream of the song.)

What The Music Blogs Are Posting Right Now

Jun 22nd, 2007 // 1 Comment


- The singing Tesla coil’s repertoire confirms it: the theme to Super Mario Bros. is the new “Stairway To Heaven.” [Create Digital Music]
- Producer David Bendeth on Bob Dylan’s assertion that modern music sounds like crap: “Bob is a legend, he wrote some of the best songs this century has heard, BUT, I bet his stereo sucks.” [Kings Of A & R]
- We had no idea that Journey released an album in 1996 that eventually went platinum. [Listen Up]
- A few tracks from the golden age of vocal groups. [boogie woogie flu]

This Is Not The Prince You’re Looking For

Jun 22nd, 2007 // 5 Comments

prince3.jpgA fake version of Prince’s Planet Earth has been circling the Internet for the last week or so, most recently appearing on the Smoking Section; it’s hard to tell who floated this copy out, but anyone who tries to play it will be treated to a batch of non-Prince tunes, including an opening dance-floor number called “When Will I Be Famous?” A few Google-lyric searches reveal that the album is most likely Push, the 1988 debut from British boy-band duo Bros. And it’s just awful.

We have no idea who decided to flood the web with faux Earth editions, and we’re especially curious as to why someone would pick this album in particular. Was it just a piss-taking anti-leak effort? Or is Prince trying to tell us something? If you have any idea, drop us a line at tips@idolator.com.

Bros – When Will I Be Famous? [MP3, link expired]

The Worst Poison Video Since The One With Bret Michaels’ Ding-A-Ling

Jun 22nd, 2007 // 7 Comments

For reasons unknown to us–or to mankind in general–a Poison fan decided to pay tribute to the band by making a video for its version of “SexyBack”; the inexplicable homage features images of overly amorous stuffed animals with superimposed human lips, and it’s every kind of ugly Freudian nightmare you’ve ever had, all at once. Is it possible to actually turn the Internet off?

Poison’s Sexyback [YouTube, via Totally Fuzzy]

Shane McGowan Doesn’t Want Your Rock N’ Roller Cola Wars

Jun 22nd, 2007 // 5 Comments

shaneshaneshane.jpgA celebrity-karaoke fund-raiser in London drew some big names last night: Nick Cave sang “Bootylicious,” while Chrissie Hynde performed “Born To Be Wild.” But this must have been the highlight:

£30,000 was bid to hear former Pogue Shane McGowan perform what was described as “a somewhat unique interpretation” of Billy Joel’s “We Didn’t Start The Fire.”

We’re not sure whether this counted as an actual performance, or whether McGowan (who’s apparently now a Corey Feldman look-alike) was pushed on stage and happened to be mumbling about Harry Truman and Doris Day, as he’s known to do. Either way, we’re hoping somebody out there caught this, and we eagerly await the shaky YouTube clip (if you happen to spot it, by the way, please let us know at tips@idolator.com).

Sir Elton is king of karaoke at £385,000 celebrity sing-song [Daily Mail]

Billy Corgan Makes Slightly Disarming Marketing Decision

Jun 22nd, 2007 // 28 Comments

spz.jpgYesterday, the Smashing Pumpkins announced a somewhat-complicated new marketing ploy for Zeitgeist, its first release in seven years: The album will be released in four different versions, with iTunes, Best Buy and Target each getting a different bonus track (for those of you who like to read lots and lots of repetitive text, the full track listings are after the click-through). Pitchfork’s news page interpreted the move as an “eff you” to fans and indie retailers on the part of Corgan:

Billy and company would like you to know that they fully support the extinction of the American independent record store at the hand of large, faceless, little-guy-crushing big boxes. They also support bleeding their fans dry.

Granted, an indie-store edition would have been nice–even if just as a retailer-appeasing gesture–and it always feels icky whenever a band cozies up to the big-boxers. But this is becoming standard practice nowadays, and SP fans are used to getting the shaft; besides, it’s hard to imagine any fans getting “bled dry,” since most of them are likely going to buy one copy and then get the rest of the tracks off some .rar page.

Anyhoo, the different editions are as follows; thanks to The Chronicles of Michael Christopher for the heads-up:

Standard:
01. Doomsday Clock
02. 7 Shades of Black
03. Bleeding the Orchid
04. That’s The Way (My Love Is)
05. Tarantula
06. Starz
07. United States
08. Neverlost
09. Bring The Light
10. (Come On) Let’s Go!
11. For God And Country
12. Pomp And Circumstances

Best Buy:
01. Doomsday Clock
02. 7 Shades of Black
03. Bleeding the Orchid
04. That’s The Way (My Love Is)
05. Tarantula
06. Starz
07. United States
08. Neverlost
09. Death From Above (Bonus Track
10. Bring The Light
11. (Come On) Let’s Go!
12. For God And Country
13. Pomp And Circumstances

Target:
01. Doomsday Clock
02. 7 Shades of Black
03. Bleeding the Orchid
04. That’s The Way (My Love Is)
05. Tarantula
06. Starz
07. United States
08. Neverlost
09. Bring The Light
10. (Come On) Let’s Go!
11. For God And Country
12. Pomp And Circumstances
13. Zeitgeist (Bonus Track)

iTunes:
01. Doomsday Clock
02. 7 Shades of Black
03. Bleeding the Orchid
04. That’s The Way (My Love Is)
05. Tarantula
06. Starz
07. United States
08. Neverlost
09. Bring The Light
10. (Come On) Let’s Go!
11. For God And Country
12. Pomp And Circumstances
13. Stellar

James Iha “Can I Just Come Over To Your House And Maybe Play Some New Stuff For You?” Version:
TBA