Guess who? Does the National Enquirer actually expect its readers to be familiar with The Gossip?
As all of you red-blooded, classic-rockin’, laughter-rememberin’ North American men–and your British counterparts–steel yourselves for the Led Zeppelin reunion, big bringdown Beth Ditto would like you to know that she thinks “Stairway” ain’t shit. More »
Hey everyone, if you’ve recently gone up a size or two (lol blog ass), do not be alarmed or even attempt to drop the weight! Because if battlin’ Beth Ditto gets her way the entire way we think about waists and hips and boobies may be on its way out:
In an interview with The Advocate, Beth Ditto says her rad-lib queer credentials make her a lesser-of-two-evils voter, with the attendant “George Bush is an illegal-immigrant-raping super-Nazi with a fire-spurting devil’s head on his cock” quote that will be making the blog rounds today. But I’m more interested in her specious “correction” of the flap that bubbled up after her nekkid NME cover and its attendant interview:
Our favorite cause, Gossip singer Beth Ditto, apparently believes that the U.K. is more condusive to being a freak and/or geek than America, and Guardian writer Julia Molony agrees. “Perhaps it’s that in America–a country historically drawn together from disparate elements–the focus of music as a collective force celebrates cohesiveness rather than difference,” Molony writes. “But over here, eccentricity offers an escape from the claustrophobia of island living.”
Well, a nation of Anglophiles certainly agrees with Ditto and Molony, idealizing Great Britain as a place where men in eyeliner dance in the streets to Cure songs with friendly chimney sweeps. But c’mon, America’s just a big island at heart, and living here can be as claustrophobic as a Lollapalooza porta-potty; this country’s roll call of weirdos and mavericks may be a little earthier, but it’s just as long as England’s. Molony’s argument also ignores the fact that the U.K. is now just as much of a polyglot culture as the U.S.; it’s not a good look that most of her examples of Britain’s “viva la difference” are melodramatic/morose white guys. (Plus I’m sure you’re just as likely to get your ass kicked in a British school for acting like Morrissey as you would here.)
You have to wonder if Ditto would be so quick to sing the island’s praises as a haven for society’s misshapes if its press corps wasn’t hugging her to its ample bosom. Like, say, giving her an advice column. In the Guardian. Speaking of which, as a bonus beat, here’s Ditto giving all of you shy, retiring wallflowers in these United States advice on how to assert yourself:
So shortly after my personal plea to Beth Ditto went up yesterday, someone posted a thread to the I Love Music message board under the heading “Has Anyone Here Interviewed Beth Ditto In the Last Six Months.” And apparently the person looking to “purchase an interview for publication” is Urb editor Joshua Glazer (or at least some joker pretending to be Urb editor Joshua Glazer):
Look, I was willing to give you the benefit of the doubt with the NME cover. Your heart was probably in the right place. But this? Perez Hilton? This has to be a gag, a sloppy Photoshop job on a slow news day from those jokers at Urb, slapping the logo on something they filched from Last Night’s Party and then passing it off as a “contest” to choose the cover for the magazine’s next issue. Right? Just look at the washed-out digi-cam quality of the photographs and the crude cut-and-paste job (especially noticeable around your noggin’). Totally a joke. Right? Please? The other photo is after the jump, along with some choice quotes from the contest’s comments section:
As you may have heard, Gossip singer Beth Ditto has displayed the majesty that her momma gave her on the cover of the NME this week. So wait, a few years ago, nudie shots of Ditto were confined to the lesbian sex mag On Our Backs and now she’s being anointed the “Queen of Cool” by the U.K.’s most toilet paper-worthy tabloid while wearing nothing but painted-on kisses? Did we miss a meeting?
