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Posts Tagged “Nicole Scherzinger”

putting the pseudo in pseudo-event

Live-Blogging The 2008 American Music Awards: Get Ready For The Triumphant Return Of The Medley

Good evening, friends! Tonight is the American Music Awards, the annual event where the American public is allowed to pretend like it cares about the music industry as the biz's most important releases either get pushed out to retail ahead of their street dates or get shoved into a dusty corner of the retailers with which they've struck exclusive distribution deals. And as if to underscore the whole "why people don't care about the music business" ideal," I'm watching the red carpet show, which apparently has contracted at least partial hostship duties to Nicole "You Know, I'm In The Pussycat Dolls" Scherzinger, who is apparently contractually obligated to flaunt her ass as she conducts awkward interviews with the likes of Steven Tyler and Ne-Yo in hopes that people actually care about her existence and maybe buy a copy of Doll Domination so as to easily conjure up further posterior-related fantasies in the comfort of their own home. Full coverage after the jump! More »

things it is way too early for

Nicole Scherzinger Has A Shoe Fetish


Speaking of LeBron James, he's apparently the latest person charged with encouraging people to care about Nicole Scherzinger again. The two appear in a (nearly four-minute!) Nike ad that's supposed to be "funny," I guess, since instead of diamonds La Scherz gets all hot and bothered when her man presents her with a pair of self-branded kicks. But it just made me think about how the Pussycat Dolls' brand of sexiness has flipped up on itself and turned into this sort of inverted camp at this point, and how Scherzinger's "turned-on" persona, which I guess still sort of works as far as titillating some people (maybe?), could probably be flipped on with an item as mundane as a jar of mustard if the price was right. [YouTube via Cajun Boy In The City]

What's a bigger sign of the Pussycat Dolls' desperation: The fact that there's already a third single from their quickly fading new album, the "Big Girls Don't Cry"-like weeper "I Hate This Part" (in which alpha Doll Nicole Scherzinger tries to go the Serious Sad Singer Playing Piano On A Beach route, I guess to confuse fans of sensitive-dude bands); or Scherzinger's assertion that Republican vice-presidential candidate Sarah Palin would make a great addition to the group because "she seems like a headstrong woman, a tough chick. And she's hot." What, no mention of Palin's flute prowess, Nicole? I mean, it's not like you're going to let her sing. [YouTube / Huffington Post]

friday chart preview

Americans Apparently Not Fooled By The Stealth Sorta-Release Of "Her Name Is Nicole"


danielgibson77: pussycat dolls might not make the top 5 albums this week
mauraatidolator: no way
mauraatidolator: haahahahaha
mauraatidolator: oh schadenfreude.
danielgibson77: metallica, ne-yo, demi lovato, kings of leon, then jazmine sullivan and PCD fighting for 5th.
mauraatidolator: nice
mauraatidolator: NICE
mauraatidolator: hahaha
mauraatidolator: oh that restores my faith in the world
mauraatidolator: not the kings of leon bit so much

In case you're wondering, the rest of the top 10 will apparently consist of Joe, Kid Rock, Lil Wayne, and Young Jeezy. [HITS Daily Double]


sorta-upcoming releases

"Her Name Is Nicole" Exists, Sort Of

Only Nicole Scherzinger's floptastic solo debut has been rebranded as a Pussycat Dolls album, and retitled Doll Domination, and given a release date of tomorrow! From two writeups of Domination that hit newsstands today: "Not that the Pussycat Dolls are turning realistic. They are, after all, a burlesque dance troupe that was recast as a vocal group featuring Nicole Scherzinger. On the album she is credited with 'all lead and background vocals,' with the other four Dolls providing 'additional' vocals." ... "Scherzinger's solo album was delayed after single 'Baby Love' and other club and download tracks failed to produce sufficient buzz. Four songs originally intended for that project are on Domination." Not that I was wholly fooled by the other four Dolls finally getting identities of sorts, but surely Scherzinger must be wondering why she can only catch a break from the public if she's operating under the umbrella of Robin Antin? [NYT / USA Today]

art?

The Other Four Pussycat Dolls Are Finally Given Identifying Marks


not-upcoming releases

Nicole Scherzinger's Solo Album Officially Dead (For Now)

From MTV's piece on the upcoming MTV Movie Awards, which will also feature uncool major-label chumps Coldplay: "The Pussycat Dolls... will also hit the stage during the irreverent awards show, broadcast live this year on Sunday, June 1. The girls will grab the mic from host Mike Myers to perform 'When I Grow Up' from their upcoming second album." I'd probably hold off from using words as, um, concrete as "upcoming" when it comes to talking about album releases featuring La Scherz—at least until someone actually pays money for a copy of Her Name Is Nicole. She seems to be a little, shall we say, jinxed in that department. (Maybe Tori Alamaze put a hex on her?) [MTV]

videodrone

Nicole Scherzinger Sings National Anthem, Avoids Adding Line About Her Genitalia


Nicole Scherzinger's 45-slowed-down-to-33 performance of "The Star-Spangled Banner" not only features her wearing an outfit that covers her midriff (perhaps that's the cause for the boos at the outset?), it's pretty straight-and-narrow—not to mention relatively in key for an a capella performance. But surely I can't be the only one who thinks that this is step one in her efforts to Kristy Lee Cook it up in a final, last-ditch effort to save her solo album from eternal label purgatory? I can't wait until she wears a red, white, and blue jumpsuit for the Macy's July 4 fireworks display and mashes her way through "God Bless The USA," complete with a posse of Statue of Liberty-dressed Pussycat Dolls behind her. After all, nothing can be worse than her Duran Duran cover, right? More »

rebrandings

Nicole Scherzinger Gets Another Makeover In The Name Of Saving Her Career

Undaunted by the eternal shelving of her very expensive solo album, lead Pussycat Doll Nicole Scherzinger is still trying every trick in the book to be taken seriously as An Artist. The latest: A promotion for a Brazil-inspired Caress Body Wash (with passion flower cream and acai oil!) that features La Scherz singing lead on the "Caress Brazilian Mix" of Duran Duran's "Rio," a song that really didn't need to be remade and that certainly didn't need to be remade with her thin vocals and a super-cheesy-sounding "Latin" guitar line. Somehow she hasn't realized yet that the American public can't miss her if she hasn't gone away, although judging by her brand-new stage name, maybe the people running her career are figuring that few people realized she was actually out there making music sans backup Dolls in the first place. More »

Last night while flipping past Girlicious, I noticed that Robin Antin was standing in front of two pieces of oaktag heralding Nicole Scherzinger's Her Name Is Nicole, which, unbeknownst to every industry observer who's had the "pleasure" of watching every single from it tank, is apparently "in stores now." (Click the picture for a fullish-sized screenshot of the poster.) Perhaps this segment of the show was shot on location in CutoutBinLand? [Earlier]

delays

Nicole Scherzinger Gives Up?

Tonight marks the premiere of the CW series Pussycat Dolls Present: Girlicious, the sequel to The Search For The Next Pussycat Doll that will set out to launch another girl group under the Pussycat Dolls' brand name-slash-marketing deal with Interscope Records. In the New York Daily News' preview of the show, not only do we learn about the Girlicious-branded merchandise that'll soon be lining your local 99-cent stores' aisles (makeup, clothing, a new album incorporating the sounds of TLC and Destiny's Child), we learn that the original Pussycat Doll—Nicole "Her Name Is Nicole" Scherzinger—will be returning to the fishnet-covered arms of the group that spawned her. More »

delays

Is Pushing An Album Back Ever Good For Its Health?

Today Kelefa Sanneh wrote about All $tar, a Nashville rapper who's been the city's "next big thing" for three years now—excxept for the fact that his debut album, Street Ball, has been in limbo since 2005, thanks to his label, Cash Money/Universal, going over the preparation for the album with what seems to be the finest-tooth comb ever. (Sanneh: "...it's not uncommon for rappers to wait months or years while labels try to figure out the right single, the right track selection, the right marketing plan.") What struck me is that I've heard about so many delayed albums lately—from Amerie to All $tar to Nicole Scherzinger—that I can't help but wonder if the music industry is further shooting its sales hopes in the foot by stoking negative buzz around albums by somewhat established stars or high-profile up-and-comers. Especially in the current environment of music, where people seem to have many excuses for ignoring records at the ready. After the jump, a few arguments against pushing release dates, marketing-department-emanating objections be damned. More »

I'm starting to wonder if I should create a keyboard macro for the phrase "Nicole Scherzinger's album has been pushed back again," because, well, it's been pushed back again. To June 23. (Recall that its original release date was Oct. 16, 2007.) I wonder how many more people will be laid off at Universal Music Group between now and the time the long-delayed lead balloon actually hits store shelves? [Toya's World]

videodrone

Timbaland Masterminds The World's "Sexiest" Bank Robbery (Or Something)


The latest single to emerge from Timbaland's Shock Value is "Scream," a Nicole Scherzinger/Keri Hilson track filled with bad sex metaphors (cake! pie! designated driving!) that Interscope, no doubt, has released in large part because the label's suits still holding on to hope that someone will eventually give a damn about the lead Pussycat Doll's singing/orgasmic moaning abilities. More »

year-end analysis that kinda rhymes

A Pussycat Doll Says Goodbye To 2007 In Verse

Despite the fact that her first solo album remains in release-date limbo thanks to every song that Interscope desperately released as a "first" single bouncing right off the charts, possibly ex-Pussycat Doll Nicole Scherzinger still enjoyed 2007, so much so that she has constructed a free associative poem/ransom note out of stuff she once read on inspirational posters that details her awesome year. More »

In the latest attempt to save her increasingly doomed solo album, Nicole Scherzinger is going the "singing about her vagina over a vaguely 'ethnic-sounding' track produced by Akon" route. It's a terrible song, but at least it makes her "I am a very conservative Catholic" claim in the new Entertainment Weekly even more hilarious—except to all the people at Interscope/Geffen who got laid off as a result of "belt-tightening," of course. [Kevipod Music]

Will a breathy, "ethnic"-sounding single with a title that will no doubt inspire a thousand "punani" jokes save Nicole Scherzinger's Her Name Is Nicole? Probably not, but that doesn't mean Jimmy Iovine won't pour wayyyy too much money out of Interscope's coffers in an effort to find out! [Kevipod Music]

straw polls

Obama Vs. Clinton: Whose Musical Taste Sucks More?

So Barry Obama's big benefit shindig coming up next week in California features musical endorsements from Ne-Yo (yay!), the Goo Goo Dolls (uh), Nicole Scherzinger (ack), and will.i.am (dear lord no). Meanwhile, Hilary Clinton has recently ditched Celine Dion's "You And I" (holy shit) as her campaign song in favor of Big Head Todd And The Monsters' "Blue Sky" (could be worse, right?). Forgetting their opinions about, like, stuff salient to running a country, this does not particularly fill us with hope for the future. (Even the Republicans are showing better taste this time out; for instance, did you know Mitt Romney's campaign tune is "I Get Around"*?) So we put it to you, a year or so early, to decide who you would vote for based solely on these less than stellar musical track records. More »