Idolator Presents: The Greatest Public-Access Music Videos Of All Time, Part 8

After taking a few weeks off–YouTube needed to replenish its amateur-hour archives–we’re back with another collection of would-be pop idols forever trapped on the stairway to stardom (the archive’s here). And if you’ve got some public-access tips, don’t be a tease-a-Louise! Send ’em along to tips@idolator.com.

5. Go Hard Or Go Home, “Da Best Of Go ‘Hard Or Go Home'” Praise be to whomever! We can’t imagine what did we do to deserve a half-hour greatest-hits compilation from Go Hard, Southern California’s finest amateur-rap showcase, but seeing this on YouTube is like getting an early Christmas present–one you can’t wait to return. The best part of this collection is that every time the music starts getting tired, a gravel-voiced host named A-FS (he’s the co-CEO of Cheddar Getta Multimedia, dontchaknow) delivers interstitial banter evidently filmed near his condo’s front door. 4. Rumpleforeskin, unknown song What’s so great about Rumpleforeskin–we think they got their name by combining the words “Rumpelstiltskin” with “foreskin,” but we’re not sure–is that their Infectious Grooves-style funk-metal sound single-handedly sums up everything terrible about Clinton’s first term. When the next generation’s Oliver Stone decides to make a decades-spanning epic about America, this clip will surely into his or her mid-’90s montage. 3. The Great Daryl Nathan, “Spinning Wheel” We’ve featured this Grand Rapids, MI, blonde buttercup before, but this might be his finest moment: An unyieldingly repetitive object immortalized in an unyieldingly repetitive tune. 2. Barry O’Toole, “Go Truck Yourself” Nothing ages worse than self-aware “wackiness.” A shades wrangler was on set, to make sure no harm came to the half-dozen or so Lennon-style sunglasses that the cast thought was a visual signpost for coolness. 1. Music Island (trailer) Come with us to a land where musicians still think that flashing devil horns makes you look cool, where no one has sideburns, and where the theme music sounds like a 1996 Vivid Video trailer. Come with us…to Music Island.