Idolator’s American Idolatry: Your Pocket Guide To The Universe Of Sanjaya

We’ll get to our full recap of last night’s American Idol in a little bit, but we felt we’d be remiss if we didn’t give Sanjaya Malakar’s performance of “Cheek To Cheek” its own rundown. During the song, Sanjaya distracted everyone from his wispy vocals by giving Paula Abdul a twirl around the judges’ table; afterwards, he thanked Simon Cowell for calling his performance “incredible” by welcoming him to “the universe of Sanjaya,” a phrase that will likely have 100,000 Google Blog Search results by day’s end.

Other details after the jump.

The white suit/polo shirt combo: Gave the whole enterprise a Love Boat/Fantasy Island/other guest-star-studded ’70s show feel. The slicked-back hair: Added a used-car-salesman feel. Tony Bennett: Apparently a fan because Sanjaya “dares to be different.” Ryan Seacrest: Apparently not a fan, given the way he grimaced every time he was forced to utter Sanjaya’s name. Paula Abdul: Easily charmed; reaction made us wonder if Sanjaya is really the 2007 version of MC Skat Kat. (Bonus: If he’s rapping, he isn’t singing.) Simon Cowell: Needs to realize that Americans do not get sarcasm. Anyone want to send him a truckload of “ironic” t-shirts? The singing: Still terrible–can someone please teach him to at least try projecting his voice?–but honestly, we’d rather see him stick around than Haley Scarnato.

American Idol [americanidol.com] Earlier: Idolator’s American Idolatry archives [Photo via Reality TV Magazine]