Will Variety Shows Save The Music Industry?

noah | January 14, 2009 2:45 am

Probably not, but that hasn’t stopped CBS from giving John Mayer the green light to have one later this season, nor has it prevented Fox from allowing the Osbournes to take over part of its schedule later this spring. Even in the wake of the bomb that was Rosie Live, television programmers are turning to the Cher-tested formula in these hard times, knowing that, hey, at least it won’t be as embarrassing as airing an infomercial during the 8 p.m. hour. (It won’t, right?) Some questions about the shows answered, after the jump.

Q1: Why?MAYER: “I love him, he is so multitalented, he has a great personality, really smart, loves television and is very funny and has a great sense of humor about himself,” said CBS president Nina Tassler.OSBOURNES: “They are raunchy and funny and also a warm, real family,” insisted Fox “president of alternative entertainment” Mike Tassler.

Q2: What?MAYER: A “music variety sketch show” with ideas dreamed up by the guitar-wielding blogger.OSBOURNES:Candid Camera-style skits, occasional pie-throwing, the odd performance by Ozzy.”

Q3: Who?MAYER: No special guests are scheduled yet, but I, personally, am hoping that he somehow frees ?uestlove from Jimmy Fallon’s clutches for a night or so. Also, he should invite the winner of his recent bake-off on. (He did tell E! that he wants to bring “true talent” to his show, after all.)OSBOURNES: “There are even a pair of ‘mini-Osbournes’—(British) child actors who dress, behave and talk as outrageously as Ozzy and wife Sharon themselves.” No, really. Also, Pamela Anderson, who I am going to right now bet will have at least one wardrobe malfunction during her appearance.

Q4: When?MAYER: Presumably, after his next seafaring adventure. (His sense of humor is way too finely tuned for him to wear the Borat thong during the show, right?)OSBOURNES: Sometime before Rock Of Love Charm School 2, I’m going to guess.