Universal Music Group’s Manufacturing Department Doesn’t Have Talent (But It May Have A Sense Of Humor)
The latest merchandising screw-up worth a giggle comes from the UK, where a pressing of the new album by Britain’s Got Talent winner Faryl Smith—a 13-year-old opera singer who even Simon Cowell likes (I can already hear the “you’re only 13!” echoes in my head)—was given music from a person who shares Smith’s surname, but not her style. Yes, that’s right, people expecting to hear Faryl Smith’s dulcet versions of standards like “Amazing Grace” and “Ave Maria” might instead be treated to the grumblings of Mark E. Smith, whose 2008 album Imperial Wax Solvent wound up being pressed to hundreds of copies of the disc, which is officially in shops a week from today. This has resulted in “severe words” beng flung the pressing plant’s way, as well as a chance for us to compare the vocal stylings of the two. Think of it as Britain’s Got Talent… But What Type Of “Talent” You Prefer Might Vary Widely!
Mark E. Smith (“Exploding Chimney” from Imperial Wax Solvent):
You know, this could result in a life-changing moment for some poor kid whose ears were used to nothing but tear-jerking melodrama. I’m just saying. (Also, how great would it be to get Mark E. in front of Simon C.? So much chest-rubbing! So many bleeps!)