April F-F-F-Foolin’: The Following Stories Are Not True, So Don’t Fall For Them (Not That You Would, You Smarty Pants)

noah | April 1, 2009 10:00 am

Aside from holidays where major news events happen, thus disrupting one’s chance to actually get away from her laptop and have a life, April Fool’s Day is probably the most annoying 24-hour stretch on the professional blogger’s calendar, thanks to everyone on the Internet thinking they’re funny. Despite that not really being true! After the jump, a running tally of pranks from various music-related entities; it’ll be updated throughout the day, because Lord knows I need to do something with all the “comedy” clogging up my RSS reader right now.

Bjork joins Led Zeppelin. Points for the sorta-convincing Photoshop of Lady B with Page, Bonham, and Jones. Extra points for claiming that she inserted an “only songs from I and IV” clause in her contract. And bonus extra points for being something I would actually want to hear. This wins the Internet for today, I think. [Bjork.com]

Nine Inch Nails‘ new album. “To download NIN’s new full-length album Strobe Light, PRODUCED BY TIMBALAND, enter a valid email address in the fields below. A download link will be sent to you immediately. Your credit card will be charged $18.98 plus a $10 digital delivery convenience fee. Your files will arrive as windows media files playable on quite a few players with your name embedded all over them just in case you lose them. You will also receive an exclusive photo and a free email account with our partner Google’s Gmail service.” Chris Cornell’s Twitter unavailable for comment. [nin.com, although be warned: I think the <blink> tag usage is going to give me a seizure.]

Comerica Park is being renamed Kid Rock Field. Not going to lie: If a friend of mine hadn’t sent me this in a “hey, did you see this April Fool’s joke?” context, I would have believed it, what with the home of the Detroit Tigers currently being named in honor of a bank and all. (If only an enterprising Mets fan had thought of this first…) [KidRock.com; HT Pat]

Peter Bjorn And John Shreds. 5.5? [YouTube]

Marty Friedman joins Limp Bizkit. Had me going there for a second, thanks to the excellent mimicry of Fred Durst‘s Twitter “style.” [MetalSucks]

“Warner Bros. Acquires The Pirate Bay.” “when i first read this it scared the shit outa me but then i looked at my calender and was sooooooooooo relived when i saw that it was april 1st. i almost had a heart attack you guys! come on not cool!!!! lol oh yeah, and 13 billion dollars??? in this economy??? yeah right WB’s aint doing shit lol” See what happens when you indulge geeks? Do you see? [The Pirate Bay]

“Deicide Frontman Converts To Christianity.” Not all that original in the grand scheme of Crazy Confessions; claim that the conversion was announced “on the band’s Web site” would have probably been a little funnier if the actual Deicide site wasn’t currently redirecting to a domain squatter. [Metal Underground]

Ethan Hawke profiles Kris Kristofferson for Rolling Stone. Oh, wait, that isn’t a joke? Huh. [RS]