Perez Hilton Moving On To Making People Who Argue In Favor Of Free Speech Look Bad By Association

noah | June 24, 2009 3:45 pm
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Perez Hilton has sued Black Eyed Peas manager Polo Molino for battery and–please make sure you aren’t drinking anything when you read this–“infliction of emotional distress” following their altercation after the MuchMusic Video Awards on Sunday night in Toronto. You would think the roffles brought by the blowhardy blogger being able to dish out “emotional distress” as his stock in trade, only to Twitter for the wahhhmbulance when he’s forced to take it (from all sides) would be enough for a news item, wouldn’t you? But thanks to us living in The Age Of Neverending Absurdity, it gets better: The former Mario Lavandiera also wants to defend himself as a crusader for free speech! Because he’s always so accepting of others who he disagrees with, right? His lawyer’s statement after the jump.

“Perez Hilton was assaulted by the Band’s road manager because he would not agree to stop writing about the Black Eyed Peas on his website Perezhiton.com. Perez Hilton files this lawsuit to protect his freedom of speech and seeks legal redress against those who have physically assaulted him because they do not like his review of their album. Whether you love Perez or hate him, he is entitled to his freedom of speech without fear of physical violence. This lawsuit will make the statement that violence is never the answer. His First Amendment rights will be vigorously protected.”

Just remember, everyone: Constantly referring to a 15-year-old pop singer by the oh-so-witty first name of “Slutty” doesn’t emotionally hurt as much as someone’s fist. Got it?Black Eyed Peas Manager Sued By Perez Hilton [Billboard]