The Jonas Brothers’ Non-Breakup: A Comment Section Reacts

noah | October 28, 2009 9:45 am

Rumors that the Jonas Brothers were breaking up, fueled by the boys going in different directions during some recent downtime, were summarily squashed by the brothers via a MySpace blog post last night. The post did note that Nick Jonas is going to release a Nashville-recorded solo album, Nick Jonas & The Administration, early next year. (“If I was to describe the sound to someone,” wrote Nick, “I would say its [sic] ‘heart & soul’, because the music that I make is from my heart, and the lyrics I write are from my soul.” Thanks for clearing that up!) And as such, it garnered pages and pages of heart- and support-filled comments from the JoBro faithful, who apparently wanted to live up to the “best fans in the world” tag that was bestowed upon them in the blog post: In addition to posts and posts begging the boys to come back to [insert location here] on their next tour—slated for summer ’10, at least for now—and one person who broke the blog post’s digital fourth wall by posting a “ Sibling-sympathetic affection:

whoa hey, didn’t expect that. Im glad you three aren’t together 24/7…I get tired of my sisters sometimes and I just want to do my own thing. Thank you for keeping us in the loop. I didn’t even know there was a rumor going around that yall were breaking up. But at the rodeo last year, the people who were selling shirts and stuff in the store were telling people that Nick was leaving the group. Don’t worry though, I set them straight and then proceded to get on a table and yell that JB wasnt breaking up and that yalls tour dates were coming out the following wednesday. love:)

Obnoxious direction from wanna be fan-fictioneers:

hey nick…… can you marry….MILEY please? :’D

(This was seconded by someone who actually chose to call herself “DANECOOK” on MySpace, which is even more of a sign that it should be summarily ignored.) Dramatic proclamations from likely drama-club members:

how can u be in two bands at once? one side is going to eventually suffer. as if youre not wanted enough…:| if JB suffers…ill be really upset. Life without JB is like my life without a stage….unliveable.

And since it’s the Internet, there always has to be one fly in the ointment, and the one who took the time to post this goes by the name of gina (lack of caps hers):

hmmm…. this kinda sounds familiar, dontcha think? it kinda sounds like the jacksons and michael, when they “weren’t breaking up” and michael went and made off the wall, and totally overshadowed his brothers. and his brothers all went and got married and they broke up because the wives convinced them they were better than the other brothers…. wow. hahaha. its like history all over again. except you guys cant even touch the jacksons talent wise, and nick is no michael. lmao. but still…. what a coincidence.

Reaction to “gina” was swift, with a mini-torrent of “LA LA I’M NOT LISTENING” replies following in this bit of troll-dom’s wake. (Oh, kids. You make it so easy.) Perhaps my favorite, though, was the one that actually bent time and space in order to make its point:

No need to be rude. Why are you on here if they have ‘no talent’. Jackson 5 are still together they just dont work any more seeing as micheals dead, and if you listen to ‘this is it’ by him you can hear jackson 5’s back vocals. So get your facts right before you start being rude, Just rememebr one thing, The Jonas brothers are much bigger then you and when they read this they will probs think what a stupid girl. So yeah, Just go away and dont wind up anymore fans, Cos ‘What goes around, Come back around.’

You know, all this digital technology, it’s making the youth of the world think that the Jackson 5—never mind the Jacksons?—are still together. What sort of reality are we bestowing upon the next generation? Are they going to think that Nirvana hasn’t broken up next? WE ARE NOT BREAKING UP [The Jonas Brothers’ MySpace Blog]