2012 MTV Movie Awards: Russell Brand Blasts Justin Bieber, Kanye West & Kim Kardashian In Opening Monologue
Russell Brand played Master of Ceremonies at last night’s 2012 MTV Movie Awards, and the British comedian and Rock Of Ages star didn’t let his recent divorce from Katy Perry keep him from keeping an eye out for a new Mrs. Brand. “The last time I hosted I did marry someone who was there, so I’m keeping my eyes open for a new wife tonight,”said Brand during his opening monologue, before shouting out actor Michael Fassbender’s name. (Fassbender was later the target of a few penis jokes, though after his naked turn in indie movie Shame, he’s probably used to that by now.)
The comedian also took some shots at Justin Bieber, referencing his recent run-in with a paparazzi. “Justin Bieber beat up a paparazzi,” said Brand. “Well done, Justin! Justin, though, is so pretty that even if he were attacking me I would do a little orgasm.” (Hey, it’s not inappropriate because Bieber’s 18-years-old… right?)
“And if after recent events you think it’s hypocritical of me joking about a celebrity beating up a paparazzi, wait until you see what I have to say about short-lived celebrity marriages,” he said, launching into sex-tape jokes about Kim Kardashian. “I just hope [Kanye West and Kim Kardashian] do a new sex tape. I think of Kim Kardashian as the Stanley Kubrick of sex tapes. They’re always brilliant, but she only does one a decade.”
Brand was also able to poke fun of himself while mocking the reality TV star, saying, “Kim took a load of pressure off me with her world-record quick marriage. Cheers, Kim.”
As if Kim, Kanye and Bieber weren’t easy enough targets, Brand also zinged John Travolta and Charlie Sheen, who was sitting in the audience. “Since we haven’t got Kanye here tonight, I need someone in this audience more unstable and reckless than me to do something stupid and start jeopardizing my green card. That someone is obviously Charlie Sheen,” he said. “Charlie, you do look well and relatively sober, so what I’ve done is taped a bottle of Hennessy and a gram of coke under your chair.”
What did you think of Russell Brand’s opening monologue and stint as host? Should Katy Perry be fired up, or was it all in good fun? Let us know what you think on Facebook, Twitter, or in the comments below.