TV - Page 4

Most Useless Segment Of “American Idol” Somehow Rendered Even More Useless By Producers’ Shenanigans

noah | March 26, 2009 2:30 am
noah | March 26, 2009 2:30 am

An American Idol flack has admitted that the group-sing segments of the weekly talent show are actually lip-synced by the hopefuls, presumably because the producers are afraid that any singers who just know they’re going to be voted off at the end of the interminable hour will go disastrously off-mic, altering the lyrics of songs like “Closer” and “I Kissed A Girl” so they’re actually about the inane commercial-break comedian or the way the steel fist of irony clamped down on Simon Cowell using “too Broadway” as an epithet against singers he didn’t like.

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“American Idol” Adds An X Factor

noah | March 11, 2009 10:00 am
noah | March 11, 2009 10:00 am

ai8_top13perform_megancorkreyLast night’s American Idol opened the competition’s not-quite-semifinal, not-quite-final round, with the 13 singers who were selected as this year’s spotlighted contestants making their way through the songs of Michael Jackson. While Paula Abdul was only interested in seemingly tipping the producers’ hand, telling both Danny Gokey and Adam Lambert that they were shoo-ins for the finale, Simon Cowell took some time to foreshadow a twist to the proceedings, one that will be fully revealed during tonight’s double-elimination episode. What could it be? Alas, it probably won’t involve bringing back Ju’Not Joyner. More »


“American Idol” Is Short On Suspense, Long On Groan-Worthy Moments

noah | March 6, 2009 8:53 am
noah | March 6, 2009 8:53 am

Last night’s American Idol showcased the varying talents of eight singers who the judges liked but who for whatever reason (demographics, tattoos, outright lousy performances) weren’t embraced by the calling and texting public. Only three of them were supposed to make it into this year’s group of Idol finalists—or so the viewers thought, until Simon Cowell revealed that this year, the “top” would number 13, not 12. Ooh, Idol, you really mixed it up! Especially for those people who DVR’d the show and missed the big “actually, we’re going to have a top 13 this year” announcement because your judges were too busy braying about commercialism and making questionable decisions to notice that they were running over the allotted time slot. (Never would I have thought I’d be professionally relieved about being a Hell’s Kitchen fan.)

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“American Idol” Pledges Allegiance To The Commercial And The Crazy

noah | March 5, 2009 10:00 am
noah | March 5, 2009 10:00 am

In addition to sending Lil Rounds, Scott MacIntyre, and Jorge Nunez through to the Top 12, last night’s peppy-for-an-elimination-episode edition of American Idol set the field for tonight’s Wild Card round. And… well, it’s more than a little disappointing. People who completely botched their initial performance—Matt Giraud? Jasmine Murray??—made it through while the velvety-voiced Ju’Not Joyner, who actually sang well on Tuesday night and brought something different to a Dullsville track, sat on the sidelines. Could he be this year’s Alex Lushington, an R & B smoothie who was just too understated for Idol? Given that Tatiana Del Toro, who seemed to have been driven back to madness (perhaps from staring at the nightmarish collision of patterns splashed across her dress for too long), also made it into tonight’s pool, I’m going to say “Probably!”

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“American Idol” Goes Through The Looking Glass

noah | March 4, 2009 11:00 am
noah | March 4, 2009 11:00 am

A performance of “Hey There Delilah” being my favorite of the night. Von Smith not being annoying. An 18-year-old with a neck tattoo. Last night’s American Idol, in which the last third of the Top 36 competed for America’s phoned-in affections, was full of odd things, and made me wonder just how the other two episodes airing this week—tonight’s finalist announcement and tomorrow’s Wild Card round—would out-weird the two hours that aired last night. Rankings and reactions after the jump!

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Which Contestants Will Be Shoved Down Our Throats During “American Idol”‘s Wild Card Round?

noah | March 4, 2009 2:00 am
noah | March 4, 2009 2:00 am

So, tomorrow night is American Idol‘s Wild Card round, in which the judges bring back their favorite singers who didn’t make the cut over the last few weeks, then grant three of them passes to the Top 12, whose finals begin in a mere six days. There are going to be eight or nine contestants—two chosen by each judge—singing for their lives on tomorrow’s show, and by the hour’s end, the judges will have placed three of them into the top 12. But who will we have to sit through tomorrow? After the jump, I pick the contestants who will probably/maybe give us a second performance tomorrow at 8 p.m. ET. (For the sake of argument, I’m going to assume that last night’s winners were Lil and Scott, as DialIdol predicts; since the third member of that top three is still up for some debate, the other 10 contestants are in the pool.)

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“American Idol” Has To Pray Just To Make It To The End Of Its Hour

noah | February 27, 2009 9:30 am
noah | February 27, 2009 9:30 am

Last night’s elimination episode of American Idol scuttled its chances for drama once again, with the final “who’s in the top 12” showdown being between the heavy favorite (this time, Adam Lambert, above) and the week’s comic relief (Nick “Normund Gentle” Mitchell) for the second straight week. Given that there was an actual surprise during the proceedings—babyfaced worship leader Kris Allen, who performed a shaky rendition of “Man In The Mirror” on Wednesday, made it to the finals despite stronger performances by at least two young ladies who didn’t make the cut—you’d think the producers would try and sequence the show so that people would be inspired to tune in all the way through. Perhaps they haven’t looked at the ratings from Wednesday yet?

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“American Idol”: How Many Of Last Night’s Contestants Could Have Used A Hug?

noah | February 26, 2009 11:00 am
noah | February 26, 2009 11:00 am

Last night’s American Idol served as yet another testament to the completely broken nature of this ridiculous 36-semifinalist setup. Most of the performances were, unfortunately, pretty bad—so lousy, in fact, that I felt for even the most off-pitch contestants, since this was pretty much their only shot to make any sort of impression on the American public and so many of them seemed completely cowed by the idea of being on the big stage. Well, at least Nick “Norman Gentle” Mitchell made his song his own, complete with Idol-specific lyrics. Rankings after the jump!

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“American Idol” Wild Card Round Explained (Sort Of)

noah | February 23, 2009 3:00 am
noah | February 23, 2009 3:00 am

With Round Two of the American Idol semifinals scheduled for tomorrow night Wednesday and Thursday (thanks, President Obama!), a glimpse into just how the Wild Card Round—which will pick the final three members of the Top 12—will be structured has finally been offered up. Apparently, Anoop Desai (pictured), whose vote tally last week was third-highest among the males, is a lock for that round thanks to people calling in; each contestant who gets the highest vote total without automatically advancing to the Top 12 this week and next will get in, too. But that’s the only say the American public will have as far as rounding out the finalist pool goes! Come with me as the selection process gets explained to us all.

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The White Stripes Quash Excitement About A Reunion By Actually Reuniting

mariasci | February 23, 2009 1:00 am
mariasci | February 23, 2009 1:00 am


We’ve all missed the White Stripes. The more time we had to appreciate them, the more valuable their particular transcendent weirdness seemed, the more unique their particular chemistry. And it’s a good shorthand symbol for Conan O’Brien’s appeal that he got Meg and Jack to reunite and play “We’re Going To Be Friends” on his final show as host of Late Night. But here’s the thing: they were horrible.

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