The Demise Of “Studio 60″: Proof That Hiring Sting Is A Didgeridon’t

sting.jpgA few weeks back, we questioned the wisdom of hiring Sting to make a cameo on the bark-at-the-moon-crazy Bizaaroworld that is Studio 60 On The Sunset Strip. But Aaron Sorkin didn’t listen to us–he was too busy ensuring that the next episode would have enough nonsensical blue-versus-red dialogue–and now the show is hovering under the axe.

We’ve said it many times here on Idolator, but apparently people still don’t realize that Sting is 100 percent, undeniably, certifiably jinxed. Employing him not only proves how out-of-touch you are with the listening public, but dooms your project to failure. The minute we saw him serenade Matthew Perry with that lute, we knew Studio 60 was a goner. For those who need further proof, check out this long litany of failed Gordon Sumner side-projects:

Tracks magazine, which featured a frowny-faced Sting on the cover of the premiere issue; it was discontinued after eight issues.
The Adventures Of Baron Munchausen, Terry Gilliam’s 1988 fiasco in which Sting made a cameo appearance.
The Emperor’s New Groove, a 2000 animated Disney film for which Sting composed a number of songs, only to have them scrapped at the last minute (his music was also sadly absent from the straight-to-video follow-up, Kronk’s New Groove).
Dune, a goddamn mess no matter how many times they recut it.
The Sweatbox, a documentary about the making of Groove that was directed by Sting’s wife and frequent Tantric recipient, Trudie Styler; it was completed in 2002, and, for legal reasons, remains unreleased.
–The 1994 hit “All For Love,” featuring Sting alongside Rod Stewart and Bryan Adams; after this one single, the three men were never to perform together again.
–The rainforest.
–The Concorde.
–The Police.

Oh, and remember that “Do They Know It’s Christmas” song? They still don’t know. We asked.

‘Studio 60′ Cancellation Imminent [Fox News]
Earlier: Last Night’s “Studio 60″ Musical Guest: Oh, Sting, Where Is Thy Death?

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  • GeddyLee

    I rarely post twice in a morning but I have to say that I lurve me a didgeridoo pun.

  • mickeyprecious

    There’s one critical moment that you left out. Sting and P.Diddy’s absolute train-wreck live performance of “I’ll Be Missing You.”

    My therapist is still trying to help me come to terms with that wretched memory. Prescription meds haven’t helped so far, but I have a feeling that more phrases like “Didgeridon’t” could do a world of good.

  • Chris Molanphy

    Don’t forget No Doubt: after he performed with them at the Superbowl, Gwen’s career took off and they never recorded again.

    Not sure how bad of a thing that was…

  • bambino

    I personally love Studio 60, and the haircut on the guy that performed with sting made my week.

  • metroville

    Do the world a favor and just let the axe fall already, NBC.


    PS – They ought to prominently feature that Dune blurb on the packaging of the movie’s next DVD release. Look:

    “A goddamn mess no matter how many times they recut it!” – Idolater.com

    The exclamation point makes it fun.

  • Ned Raggett

    The Sweatbox…just, no.

  • Anonymous

    Any mention of Sting ever makes me start scrolling through iTunes for Atom and His Package’s ‘Sting Cannot Possibly be the Same Person Who Was in The Police’.

  • brasstax

    Yeah, I like Studio 60 too. But I really doubt I’d miss it all that much if it goes away. Maybe D.L. Hughley will end up getting better roles in the future as a result of it all, though.

  • frstlymil

    So, Studio 60 is losing against Necrofilia Porn and David Caruso doing his best Jack Lord in Hawaii Five-O impersonation – (oh yes, just watch a Five-O episode and you’ll see). Too bad. I was actually enjoying a show that treated the audience as if they were literate.

  • drjimmy11

    “Quadrophenia” the movie is actually pretty good, the first half anyway. But I think the overall point is valid.

    Also, I once went to a comedy club and had to sit in the front. The “comedian” made a joke about my then-girlfriend wanting to have tantric sex with Sting. We broke up a few months later.

  • strangely_brown

    I’m sorry, but a list of Gordo’s failed side-projects that fails to include the cinematic nightmare that was his turn as Dr. Frankenstein in “The Bride” is sadly incomplete.

    “A Woman Born of Lightning… A Man Driven By Obsession”

    And some guy on imdb credits this film with destroying Jennifer Beals’ then-promising career. http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0088851/

  • Steve518

    Don’t forget Guy Ritchie’s career…

  • Paul D

    I demand satisfaction!
    Pistols at dawn!

    Dune is the second best sci-fi movie ever. (The best of course being Flash Gordon.)

    Ever.

  • KurticusMaximus

    Man, Studio 60 was good, too. Sure, it was just West Wing without Bartlet, but West Wing was awesome!

    There goes one of the only reasonably intelligent dramas on a big network. Time to tenaciously hold onto House for dear life. And buy the West Wing DVDs.

  • Little Mintz Sunshine

    Great. If they cancel this show I will need a new show to hate on. Anyone know if The Nine is still on? What about Jericho? As if I don’t already have enough to do. Thanks Sorkin.

  • PepeThePrawn

    The word “Pretentious” comes to mind

  • Chris Molanphy

    I have mixed feelings seeing all these folks defend Studio 60, ‘cuz I wanted it to be good and gave it a c… that you can’t base a show on the premise that “most TV is crap, and now we’re gonna make it great again,” and then offer shitty sketches like “Pimp My Trike.”

  • Chris Molanphy

    Hey, do you guys know why every time I embed a link in a comment, it gets truncated? Sorry.

  • PengIn

    I wanted to like that show, but I couldn’t get past the whole “The world will end if our fake news segment is funny enough!” aspect of it.

  • dshramek

    I used to work for an ill-fated little game studio. We were owned wholly by a UK company manufacturing a hand-held gaming device. You may have heard of the debacle. It was called the Gizmondo. The company folded due in large part to rampant fraud perpetrated by the Swedish Mafia board of directors. That spectacular Malibu Ferrari Enzo crash? One of those guys.

    We were working on a game with Sting. I never understood what the game was, as it wasn’t my studio, but we plastered Sting’s name all over the promotion of the thing. I used to blame the Swedish mafia guys, but now, I know it’s the Sting curse.

  • sock puppeteer

    Paul D.
    Are you actually admitting that you understood “Dune”?
    And which version?
    The incomprehensible theatrical one or the equally but differently incomprehensible TV one that was re-edited from that one?

    I just think that Alicia Witt grew up & got hot, very HOT!

  • Mo!

    Also after Cheb Mami did “Desert Rose” with Sting, Cheb Mami never had a hit in the US and Arab music never became popular in this country again.

    Where’s Led Zeppelin when you need them?

  • gorillavsmarykate

    Credibility, I’ll Be Missing You.

  • Anonymous

    just g

  • mishaps

    I saw Rhett Miller years ago at Fez, and he talked about how since he’d turned 30, he was somehow upbeat all the time. “Maybe I’ll turn into Sting!” he exclaimed in horror, and did a not-bad Desert Rose riff.

    Sure enough, both of his solo albums? Lame. I hadn’t realized he’d brought the Sting of Sumner down on himself that night, but it’s all coming clear to me now.

  • LurkerWithout

    Hey now, Sting once rescued Bart Simpson from a well.

  • cmoney214

    i think you are full of it.. sting is not only a great musician but a damn good actor… why so jealous? why not pick on the bad guys and leave one of the few people who always trys to do good work alone..put your claws back in people and find something better to do!!!!

  • Chris Molanphy

    I see that, as of 1 Nov 06 at 11:12 a.m., Idolator’s new “letting anyone comment” policy is bearing fruit.

  • ancalime

    Well, to make Sting responsible for failing Studio 60 is as stupid a comparison as to say in China a sack full of rice falls over because Sting sneezed loudly! ;-))))

    Sting wasn’t responsible for either the shit scripts by Dune and studio 60, for Disney’s internal mess at creating “An Emperors New Groove”, for Disney’s not admitting that (which is filmed in “The Sweatbox”), and the last time I checked he wasn’t the editor in charge of Tracks magazine! LOL

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