Kid Rock Goes From Waffle House Scraps To Flame Wars

Nov 9th, 2007 // 20 Comments

kidmugshot.jpgIndustry pundit Bob Lefsetz, as he is wont to do, wrote a long, splenetic screed about Wednesday night’s CMA Awards to his mailing list, and included within was a reference to fast-forwarding through parts of the show, with the (completely understandable!) reasoning “Fuck Kid Rock.” Well apparently Kid doesn’t take kindly to being both dissed and pretty much ignored, so he fired up his e-mail and sent Lefsetz a gramatically challenged note:

Im sure its difficult to sit on the bench while us folks play in the big game. Your a failed musician with a big mouth.

You try to make a name for yourself with half ass opinions based on everyone who is actually trying to do something in music. Yet you do NOTHING but talk. See you on the streets you punk ass mother fucker!!!

Kid Rock

On the streets? Well, Waffle House parking lots are paved, so I guess they kind of count. But wait, there’s more, because it’s the Internet!

From: Bob Lefsetz
Subject: Re:
Date: November 8, 2007 4:14:03 PM PST
To: kidrock@_________
Cc: Billy Ritchie, Ross Schilling, Ken Levitan, Livia Tortella, Lyor Cohen, Rick Roskin, Rick Rubin, Ian Rogers

Oh lighten up Bob.

Don’t you remember me singing your praises during the “Devil Without A Cause” days?

Yeah, you spend time in Nashville. Recorded your album at Bluebird…

But, are you a rocker or a country act? I’m against people from other genres stunting on these TV awards shows. If you’d come out and sung a country song, if your music had been moving up the country chart…I would have said something different. But, this just looked like a promotional appearance.

I applaud your irreverence. Just didn’t wholly work here.

But isn’t it interesting that you’re so irreverent, and then I am and you’ve got a thin skin!

I was surprised that your record did as well as it has. Good for you.

And don’t worry, your peeps are looking out for you. I got e-mail excoriating me, defending you…

But if you’re in the spotlight, if you’re in the public eye, you’ve got to take criticism with a grain of salt. It goes with the territory.

As for being a failed musician… Never. Maybe a failed competition freestyle skier!

Good for you for canning Punch! Now embrace new technology.

Keep bonding with your fan base.

Your buddy,
Bob

That thin-skinned line is pretty classic. (Perhaps Kid is just grooming himself to become the next Bill O’Reilly once the music business finally hits the shitter for good.) Now, do you notice the cc’s in Lefsetz’s e-mail? As it turns out, they weren’t put in there by the cranky ol’ coot–they were instead inserted by the Kid himself. Lyor Cohen and Rick Rubin. Do you think they get cc’d on these sorts of things a lot?

Anyway, Kid wrote back!

From: kidrock@_________
Subject: Re: lighten up! Haha
Date: November 8, 2007 4:55:12 PM PST
To: Bob Lefsetz
Cc: Billy Ritchie, Ross Schilling, Ken Levitan, Livia Tortella, Lyor Cohen, Rick Roskin, Rick Rubin, Ian Rogers

Stunting? I had a fucking ball last night while you were typing emails. You got a big mouth and no weight to back it up. you can mother fuck me all day long, but i will see you one day, and when i do it will be fun to watch you bitch up! ….ohh and last time i checked it makes perfect sense to make promotional appearances asshole. And i didnt can punch, dickhead, he is one of the greatest managers of all time. I also didnt record my album at bluebird, i did overdubs at “blackbird”….your last email shows just how inaccurate your facts are. Cant wait to watch you bitch up!

Kid Rock

Ooh, a fact-checking cuz and a hater of bloggers. This guy sounds like my dream reader! (Hi Kid, if you’re reading this! Drop me a line, we can go out for hash browns!)

From: Bob Lefsetz
Subject: Re: lighten up! Haha
Date: November 8, 2007 5:02:25 PM PST
To: kidrock@_________
Cc: Billy Ritchie, Ross Schilling, Ken Levitan, Livia Tortella, Lyor Cohen, Rick Roskin, Rick Rubin, Ian Rogers

Mea culpa. Blackbird.

As for the truth re Punch, I’ll never know for sure. But he hurt your career more than he helped it. You had your biggest hit BEFORE he came on board.

As for the attitude… For a guy with such intelligent rhymes, I’m stunned that all you can come up wth here is drivel about me “bitching up”.

Hey, I give you credit for making it. As AC/DC sang, it’s a long way to the top if you wanna rock and roll… But, I’m stunned that you’re evidencing the behavior of the street as opposed to the millionaire you are.

And your new album STILL isn’t on iTunes. Even Metallica and Zeppelin have made deals. The thinking here?

Come on, let’s not get physical, let’s use our brains.

Your friend, if you’d only be open about it…

Bob

Kid Rock’s rhymes “intelligent”? Bob, you can be his friend, but honesty is usually valued among friends. Just saying. And Kid wasn’t having any of that nicey-talking anyway!

From: kidrock@_________
Subject: Re: lighten up! Haha
Date: November 8, 2007 5:37:57 PM PST
To: Bob Lefsetz
Cc: Billy Ritchie, Ross Schilling, Ken Levitan, Livia Tortella, Lyor Cohen, Rick Roskin, Rick Rubin, Ian Rogers

You went from “fuck kid rock” to lets be friends pretty fucking quick bitch boy!

Kid Rock

Ah, that classic Kid Rock wit. Somehow, a punch seems like it would have been a lot more eloquent here.

The Lefsetz Letter [Wordpress]

  1. Anonymous

    “everyone who is actually trying to do something in music.”

    Okay, somebody please tell me what Kid Rock has actually DONE, apart from recycling Skynyrd licks and recording crap duets with Sheryl Ho. (RIP Kevin Gilbert.)

  2. Charlie Kerfelds Jetsons Tee

    Holy shit.

    Thank you so much for posting this.

  3. Jerkwheat

    oh sure, laugh it up now – but when “The Complete Letters of Robert Ritchie” ends up topping the NYT Bestsellers list in 20 years time, Kid will be there to bitch your ass up

  4. Ned Raggett

    And I thought Kid was all socially relevant.

  5. Rob Murphy

    …And your new album STILL isn’t on iTunes. Even Metallica and Zeppelin have made deals. The thinking here?…

    This has boggled my mind for several years now. Why hasn’t Kid Rock yet agreed to sell his stuff at iTunes and other digital music stores.

  6. Anonymous

    Your a failed musician with a big mouth.”

    Well, at least we can say that his spelling capabilities somehow match his typical appearance. (white trash)

  7. extracrispy

    Have I mentioned that my brother dressed for Halloween as “Waffle House Kid Rock”? It really was the best costume I saw this year.

    [a264.ac-images.myspacecdn.com]

  8. Recury

    way to bitch out bitch boy!

  9. Camp Tiger Claw

    This reminds me of that time I saw a dog run into a brick wall.

  10. FionaScrapple

    Well I, for one, will not bitch up…Fuck Kid Rock!

  11. nh_dave

    I think Kid Rock was much better during the polyfuse method era. Trying to act relevant to anything other than his own ego really isn’t a good look for him.

  12. Oh Word

    ha, this is awesome.

    But where are you seeing it? I don’t see it on the Lefsetz site…

  13. Maura Johnston

    @Oh Word: It was e-mailed to subscribers today. He doesn’t post his e-mails on the site for some reason. Which is a shame, because they’re often more informative than his rants!

  14. Swankster

    Good to see passive aggressive Internet fighting is not limited to losers on message boards, oh wait.

  15. loudersoft

    I hope Kid Rock lives a long time so that I don’t have to deal with people martyring his ignorant ass.

  16. Bob Loblaw

    Shit like this makes me think the Wizard of Oz was the most
    prescient dude of all time. GO BACK BEHIND YOUR CURTAIN, EVERYBODY
    EVER, BUT MOST ESPECIALLY KID ROCK.

  17. Anonymous

    @Swankster:
    Seriously….it’s like Ain’t It Cool News + strippers, coke and a platinum record or two.

  18. Botswana Meat Commission FC

    My boss is totally trying bitch up today.

  19. rogerniner

    @DHMBIB: He doesn’t hold much truck with that there technology, now that he’s properly countrified. Wait… let’s look on iTunes and see… Underwood… Garth… Hank Williams… Cash… huh. Well, guess that nukes that sterotype.

  20. Anonymous

    i don’t even know why i subscribe lefsetz. even when i read this post i was only slightly amused.

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